Cafe & Networking Podcast from studio in Brazil

Today I had the privilege to be talking on a podcast with Thomas Reaoch who interviewed me about my recently published book - that still small Whisper.  Enjoy!

https://youtu.be/WxsanWXS-cs

Carla Wicks, Author, that still small Whisper

June 25th, 2021

It's been awhile since I last blogged here and much has happened in not only my life but the lives of everyone around the globe.  2020 happened.  A Global pandemic. The way we interacted with each other changed and many found themselves isolated, hungry for a touch and desperate in their soul.  Fear tried to latch on to hearts and minds and in many cases accomplished just that leading to more loneliness and despair.

But good I truly believe comes from bad.  I have witnessed it in my own life and it has been a resounding theme making me the person I am today. I learned after several experiences that if I would take the very thing meant for my destruction and turn it around for good something exponential happened.  The good outweighed the bad and brought a joy I still find hard to adequately explain.  I also took what was meant to bring me down and purposed to help others navigate their own quicksand valley. 

So last year in my time, which I had plenty of, I dusted off a devotional/prayer guide I had done with a few ladies and got it ready for publication.  I added more personal stories and born was: that still small Whisper.  I truly believe the power in the 40 short daily entries will take the weariness of life and bring inspiration and motivation for everyone to have a daily personal encounter where disappointments fade, burdens are lifted and hope is renewed.

So grab a copy of the book on Amazon or Barnes and Noble and be prepared to hear more than you ever imagined and in turn be an inspiration to those you come in contact.

Grace to All Podcasts with Paul Gray

It was an honor to be asked on Paul Grays podcasts.  We have a Lawrence, Kansas connection from a few years back.  We have since connected on line and I was happy to have time to chat with him.

"That Still Small Whisper Part 1"

Paul’s first interview with Carla Wicks, Author, Playwright, USAF Veteran, Gold Start Mother (and mother of 9 children) and fascinating story teller!

https://omny.fm/shows/grace-to-all/that-still-small-whisper-part-1

"That Still Small Whisper Part 2"

Paul’s second interview with Carla Wicks, Author, Playwright, USAF Veteran, Gold Start Mother (and mother of 9 children) and fascinating story teller! 

https://omny.fm/shows/grace-to-all/that-still-small-whisper-part-2

For those that know me I am fiercely patriotic, honor and love our flag and am a defender of our freedoms including being affectionately labeled…”The Flag Police.”

My love for our nations symbol of freedom goes back to my G7 Grandfather who fought for the Virginia militia in the American Revolution up to and including all the military family members in my lineage who have served and those who are departed.

American history education plays a big part in instilling a love of country.  As a Veteran and Gold Star Mother I love being a supporter of Wreaths across America, just one of many organizations, where their core principles are Remember, Honor, Teach - helping instill values. My fellow Gold Star mothers and Daughters of the American Revolution sisters are huge advocates of serving others and bolstering Americanism.

All Americans should know the difference, yet many get confused, between Memorial Day (Originally called Decoration Day) and Veterans Day (Originally called Armistice Day).  The former in May each year, honors our departed loved ones who have served in the military while the later in November each year, acknowledges those who, are living, and have served in the US Military.

If you have attended a military funeral you may have witnessed the American Flag being folded.  On this weekend leading up to Memorial Day, while I was looking at the folded flags on our military hallway wall – one for my son and the other for my father-in-law, I wondered how many know what the “folded” flag symbolizes?  Here’s a bit of education, borrowed from the American Legion Auxiliary website, as we head into this weekend.

The first fold of our flag is a symbol of life.

The second fold signifies our belief in eternal life.

The third fold is made in honor and tribute of the veteran departing our ranks, and who gave a portion of his or her life for the defense of our country to attain peace.

The fourth fold exemplifies our weaker nature as citizens trusting in God; it is to Him we turn for His divine guidance.

The fifth fold is an acknowledgment to our country, for in the words of Stephen Decatur, “Our country, in dealing with other countries, may she always be right, but it is still our country, right or wrong.”

The sixth fold is for where our hearts lie. It is with our heart that we pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

The seventh fold is a tribute to our armed forces, for it is through the armed forces that we protect our country and our flag against all enemies.

The eighth fold is a tribute to the one who entered into the valley of the shadow of death, that we might see the light of day, and to honor our mother, for whom it flies on Mother’s Day.

The ninth fold is an honor to womanhood, for it has been through their faith, love, loyalty, and devotion that the character of the men and women who have made this country great have been molded.

The 10th fold is a tribute to father, for he, too, has given his sons and daughters for the defense of our country since he or she was first-born.

The 11th fold, in the eyes of Hebrew citizens, represents the lower portion of the seal of King David and King Solomon and glorifies, in their eyes, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.

The 12th fold, in the eyes of a Christian citizen, represents an emblem of eternity and glorifies, in their eyes, God the Father, the Son, and Holy Ghost.

The last fold, when the flag is completely folded, the stars are uppermost, reminding us of our national motto, “In God We Trust.”

The lyric …. “the flag still stands for freedom and you can’t take that away” was at it’s penning, is now and forever will be very powerful. 

Quiet time thoughts in troubled times

Indulge me to share some tidbits from a recent quiet time of mine.  Understand I imagine Christ as if He was sitting with me and we were sharing intimately with each other.  For these precious moments of the day the world goes away and it is He and I.   When reading the Word I look for and expect Him to bring boldface to any passage He is speaking to me, Rhema if you want the fancy term.  I have learned over the years to listen more and speak less. I have learned that listening for what Christ wants to impart to me is far better than what I have to tell Him.  And as is true in any relationship one learns more and develops deeper through listening. I offer this in the hope it will touch you as it did me.

I had become saddened by recent turmoil in our nation.  Observing the news, listening to others verbal opinions and watching actions taken or boasted about had become bothersome to say the least.  I wept over the issues at the forefront and wanted to know what I could do, or be, to help….if anything.  It was going to require some deep exposure of my own heart.

I became a born again Christian in 1974.  Life before this was ridden with heartache and trauma.  Some of what I have walked through has barely left me upright and has caused pain the depths most people will never know.  But through the years of developing my relationship with Jesus I have allowed Him to bring a level of understanding to my pain.  I sat one day with tears flowing like a river and proclaimed to Him I would steward the disappointments and destroying events that the enemy sought to use to silence me and turn it for good if the Lord would allow.  If even one person could be helped out of a pit of despair than every tear I shed and every heart stabbing pain I experienced would be worth it all. 

For you see describing oneself as a Christian, you know…a follower of Christ, claiming Him as Lord, holds one to a standard most have not really contemplated…deeply.  How do I know?  Because I have listened to verbal stones being hurled as if their definition of Christian meant they were judge, jury and executioner.  Actions beyond verbal assaults have left injured humans in the wake causing casualties to mount.  Some wounded, some destroyed.  This is NOT Christ like.

There is no way to live a perfect life.  Sin will abound.  The very Bible Christians use as their guide for life lists COUNTLESS, yes COUNTLESS actions, beliefs, attitudes, thoughts, and behaviors as SIN.  You can’t wake up and move through the day without committing a sin.  The most important part…there is no hierarchy of sin.  There is not one more grievous than another, not to God.  Yes it is man who is quick to list them in severity.  I detest my own sin.  I may not murder but I get angry.  Yikes, keeping it real. You now like Paul…struggling with what he wished he could do versus what he does do.

The hope we hold onto is that God made a way and Jesus paid the price.  I claim His blood shed on an old rugged cross as forgiveness and ask for Him, daily, to wash me when I stumble, fall, fail to live up to His name.  I can find myself bold and headstrong like Peter some days and demanding what’s fair like Martha on others.  But I long to be like Mary and sit adoringly clinging to His every word. 

I am not a gooey grace Christian either.  I believe in the wrath of God when evil abounds.  Life lived outside the bounds of the maker of the universes restraints carries correction.  The Bible is full of accounts where a very loving God “can’t stands it no more.”  There are ramifications to sin.  You know it.  Parents love their children but through that love they nurture yet teach with discipline.  Sometimes it smarts.  God loves us far too much to leave us in sin which leads to a place away from Him. 

Excuse me but He knit you from inception.  He designed you in His image and has a plan for you.  No matter what you think of yourself His thoughts, desires and purpose is greater than your mind can imagine.  He, I said HE, is the one who convicts the heart and transform the man.  Our part…….. is love.  Love when it is impossible, love when you don’t see how, and love when you don’t “feel like it.”  The one who causes your very heart to beat can show you how. 

Loving is the summation of scripture woven intricately through every movement of every person.  It is the action, motive, and attitude for living a Christian life.  It is commanded of us, yep COMMANDED. We need to stop taking a verse here or a chapter there and use it like a rolled up paper for spanking.  THE book, the Bible, is about learning to love, truly love each other.  Love is a drawing force.  It binds, heals, and pulsates life.  Love is the path, the journey, the direction, and the light. You are either on it or in a ditch somewhere and ditches lead nowhere.  All ditches do is breed despair, despondence, and death.

Please use the mouth the Lord gave you to speak life, affirm others, lend hope, uplift and encourage.  Ask yourself honestly if your words and actions are stones?  Remember you are not the judge.  Nope, no how.  Has there been and injury to your life that is coming out your mouth?  Think about it.  For years and even today in my own life this is the case.  I have to consciously evaluate the motive behind my words to really see where they are coming from.  Does your heart need mending?  Would you walk the path of love and spend time asking God to touch you?  He will….every time.  Surround yourself with others on the path and don’t wallow in the ditch.  As for me this is my prayer.

Dear Lord,

Help me to fix my eyes on you every day, stay true to your commands and be vigilant to love more.  Guard my heart and mind.  Let my mouth be an instrument of praise.  Forgive me where I have sinned and will in the future.  My desire is to be found faithful and so deeply in love with You that is spills out to others.  Thank you for the cross and it’s provision and promise for a life everlasting with You.

Amen

Three attitudes

I am blogging again.  Hadn't done much writing since early 2013 but have determined to get more regular in 2015.

During a season of frustration in late 2014 I inquired of the Lord.  I needed direction.  I was approaching my 60th birthday and I was miserable.  I knew in my heart God was with me but I didn't know what to do as I faced some challenges.  I prayed and He answered, BIG time.  What He spoke to my heart I knew was Him because it kinda smarted.  You know,  felt a bit uncomfortable.  But as a obedient child of God I purposed to commit my ways to Him.  What happened in the next few weeks was puzzling but had the hand of God all over it.  The story wouldn't mean much to anyone but me but the three directives He gave me I know will help anyone who is searching for answers, feels lost, or is discouraged.

This is what He spoke to me.  "I want you to be content where you are, practice gratitude for life in the present and be joyful always."  The three components: Contentment, Gratitude and Joy.

It was a tall order for me at the time but what has come from it is so very special.  I have learned to rest in my present life being satisfied AS IT IS.  I amped up my thanksgiving to include ALL my blessings, even the ones that don't look like blessings. I determined to be showing joy EVERYWHERE I went.

So my questions for you to reflect upon:
1) Are you content or are you constantly looking for more, change, a different way?
2) Do you spend ample time each day being grateful for your blessings as well as you struggles?  You know, being grateful IN everything not FOR everything - big difference.  Grateful in the good times and in the NOT SO good times.
3) Are you full of joy? Like a Jewish Kiddush cup, does it overflow from you so others are nourished by the abundance in your life?  Are you offering it to others?

In your daily time of rest and reflection you might ponder these things and inquire of the Lord for yourself.

A Tribute to Ken my beloved

It has been about a week since I have blogged.  I have missed it but have also been in real need of Jesus time.  I am still needing to hear more from the throne and will escape back to my quiet retreat.

But today as I was working I had to take time out to write this and wanted to share it with my readers.  I know it will touch the hearts of many because I know we all struggle with issues.  I promised in this blog to be real and transparent.  This is about as big a gut check as it gets.  

I love this man God has brought into my life and honoring him is way past due.

My Tribute to a Father and Daughter and Daughter

Today while working at home I decided to turn on some music from my iPad.  I love music and even though singing has been a great source of enjoyment for me over my life it has not been something I have spent much time doing over the last twelve years.  That however is another story.

My songs “shuffle” and I soon heard a song begin from one of my favorite musical’s Les Miserables.  I had no idea when I first saw this musical in the 1980’s how it would come to impact my life.  I have seen it so many times including Christmas night 2011 in Dallas when my husband and I took our adopted granddaughter, Nicole, to her first professional theatre production.  She had used Cosette’s song “Castle on a Cloud” for a Children’s theatre audition.  Never realizing how much she had in common with this character. The message of this musical is timeless, incredible poignant and powerful. 

It felt surreal though this Christmas 2012, when all three of us went to the Christmas Day debut of Les Miserables on the big screen.  What a difference this production would make over one year’s time for our family.

I began to sing to the song playing on my iPad and was overcome with a profound sorrow.  I could feel it deep in my soul.  The tears would not stop and I could no longer sing along.  It was just hitting too close to home. 

Let me explain.

Ken and I married in 2000.  Both of us had four children from our previous marriages.  Combined we had eight but I had lost my oldest son in 1996 while he was serving in the US Navy.  No parent should ever have to bury a child.  The grief of losing them is so unconscionable and very difficult to navigate.  To our horror though grief struck our doorstep again.  This time for Ken. 

We lost Nicole’s birth mother, Candice, the youngest adult daughter of my husband, Ken.  What ensued was the grief journey I knew all to well.  This time I was in the support role for my husband, knowing how hideous and overwhelming the next days, weeks and months would be.

Even though we have had Nicole since she was eight weeks old, Candice has been in contact with her over the years; family dinners, birthdays, and holidays.  Nicole was aware Candice was her birth mother and the circumstances why she was unable to parent.

Behavior, actions and poor choices led Candice through some difficult and devastating circumstances of life.  Although many family members tried to help, the culmination of a rough life took it’s toll.  Candice knew the severity of her medical prognosis and accepted it, holding out hope for a miracle.  She expressed her regret of choices made many times as well as her tremendous appreciation to her father for raising Nicole.  Candice most definitely loved Nicole and was comforted to know her only child was in his keeping.  When Candice became gravely ill this year she was accepting of ‘come what may’ and eventually succumbed from a complication of her illness on October 29th, 2012.

Whenever a family suffers with a family member who has gone wayward it takes a toll on everyone.  You love the sinner but not the sin.  You want to support and rescue but have to watch you are not used, abused or acting as enabler for their decisions.  Dysfunction on the part of the wayward person has a way of penetrating everyone in proximity.  You want to do the right thing, but it often becomes cloudy as to what that looks like.

My husband’s ultimate act of love came when he said yes to adopt Nicole.  He knew it would mean several things to him and us as a newly married couple.  Hopes and dreams for the future would be put on hold and possibly never come to fruition, it would require more stamina and finances meaning no retirement.  There was also a return to nighttime feedings, preschool tantrums and school homework.  The future would bring driving lessons, dating, another college education and a wedding to plan for.  But he said yes, we welcomed this child with open arms, and began relying daily on a big God to be our rock, our source, our everything.

I honor my husband because through the years he never waivered in his love and support for his wayward daughter.  When family were exhausted by excessive manipulation, dishonesty and pity parties, he held firm to God and did what Jesus would do, love in spite of it all. 

I am most sorrowful because of my participation in wanting him to pull back.  I was watching him struggle with not knowing how to help or when he was enabling.  It was taking a huge physical, mental and emotional toll on him and as his spouse I didn’t know what to do.  Tough love is what I thought.  I couldn’t lose my husband.  When was enough, enough.

But despite the results of a family meeting, with expressions of love and support for Ken, he prayed and stood firm on his rock, Jesus!  When Candice passed a few weeks later he was relieved to have held firm his commitment as a father.  Candice slipped into the arms of Jesus knowing her earthly father loved her much and her heavenly father loved much more.  She was the daughter of a father who patterned his life like Jesus and a daughter of the King of Kings.  Ken was not only her dear ‘Pops’ but was now the best daddy in the world, watching over Nicole.

So listen to “Fantine’s, Come to me” from Les Miserables and you will hear Candice, Ken and Nicole’s story.  Ken, however, has never shared Jean Valjean’s criminal past but has experienced the transforming love and grace of God just like every person who has confessed Christ as Lord and asked to be clean from the sin life in which we were all born into this world.

God has blessed me to be able to participate in this story of love and redemption as a wife and mother.  Those are roles I won’t take for granted.  I’ll cherish them and with Jesus do to it to the best of my ability.

Day 208 - What to do with blah....

Well today was the day to come to terms with a broken area of mine and an area of transformation only God can fix.  It has everything to do with a root of fear & regret.

For many people younger than myself this maybe a topic you have yet to explore mentally.  The reason, you still have years at your disposal to do what you want, change career paths, reach for new heights, be all you can be and then some.

Living in transition and then in dismay over what you wish you would have done, could have been, wanted to do can leave a person feeling blah......

Today was a blah...... day for me.  Although I have an impressive resume from over thirty years in my career there is still a void in my life.  I love that I have done so much in my career and even though I stand on the verge of something even more challenging I do have moments of wondering just how it is all going to play out.  The success I have will be totally dependent on God blessing this newest journey, the culmination of a thirty year career, a way of giving back to those coming behind me.  It is scary, requires a ton of work and is a faith walk like I have never done before.

But in my quiet time this week I have been struggling with feeling over-the-hill, out of youthful drive and well just blah....  I think it is because I am longing for something more in my spiritual life.

Although I do have about forty years believing in Jesus, living a life committed to the kingdom, have established a prayer life and seen miracles only God could perform in my life, there is a part of me that has yet to develop spiritual richness.  It has led me to blah.....  I think this is why I am unsettled, still seeking something to fulfill, wondering if there is time left for me to make a difference.  Will there be anything I can offer at my age and who will want or value it once I develop the inner richness my spirit is hungering for.

For this reason I am going to enter a time of spiritual retreat.  Once I have "transformed" I will be back to the blog.  I am no longer satisfied with just going through the motions, writing about trivial daily routines.  I want God to do a real work in my spirit.  I am going to be back to this blog when I have some meaningful information and insight to share with you, my readers.

I thank you in advance for your prayers.

Lord, I thank you for my faithful readers who have followed me for these past 208 days.  I now want to  experience something which will not only be impactful for my walk but also for me to share in this years journey with those following my blog.  Bless each of them and may we all find our purpose and meaning for living in the Cross and know we have in fact been everything You fashioned us to be at our conception.  I leave my life in Your hands Almighty God and everything You desire for me I am determined to experience.  It is my broken and transforming journey taken to a whole new level.  Amen

So as I drag myself a bit further up this steep climb there is a break in the clouds.  I can see I have reached yet another plateau.  I strain to get my whole body up to this level place.  I am winded, exhausted and slightly depressed.  My journey which started out so full of anticipation and excitement is becoming a laborious event and the purpose a mystery.  I am trying very hard to stay motivated and yet I have come so far there is no other way except forward.  Going back is not an option.

So while I sit resting on this mountain I bow my head and pray.  I find there is more I need before I can continue.  I decide this is the place I will build an altar.  I'll stay here till I feel an increase in His presence and a purposeful plan.  I can sense a stirring in my spirit and I don't want to move.  I want to draw as much from God as I can in this place.  I know it will be vital for the rest of my journey.

I place my belongings aside and yield all of me to the process of diving deeper into prayer.  For as long as it takes I will stay right here.  There is nothing I want more than everything God has in store.  He has brought me safely here to this place and I will rest in His love for me while I seek a deep walk.