Do you have a passion? Is there anything that excites you? How about moves you to tears or action? For years I not only didn't have passion but I was so shy it was terrible. In elementary school all the way through high school I was very shy and often times didn't see myself in any positive light.
From earlier blogs I have mentioned my early childhood and the precarious position I was in as the oldest child and an unwanted one at that. I have two younger brothers and the sun rises and sets with both of them in the eyes of my parents. Since I grew up with a perfectionist father who was very stern I never heard postive words of affirmation let alone experience love. So it was not wonder that as a child I was shy and never voiced any opinion, keeping to myself and dreaming of what might be.
For those of you that know me I am far from shy now. I enjoy speaking and even more enjoy standing up for what I believe. I am always there for the underdog and I do not allow anyone to get me told. I have worked in the profession of dentistry for over thirty years and my resume is full of just about everything you can do in my career field except the position of dentist. I love to write, read, scrapbook and spend quality time with my grandchildren. All of these things are passions for me.
My problem is that sometimes it is hard to harness the energy and passion. I can get so wrapped up in doing that I fail to enjoy being. Kinda like Martha and Mary in the Bible. I am definitely a Martha. I have to watch that I temper the words I speak, prioritize my days while always being life giving and positive. Finding time to sit with Jesus would be awesome instead of making sure I have His back, lol.
How about you? Could you say with certainty that passion fuels you to be your best? Do you think of others and handle situations with dignity and respect or are you a resounding gong? How about your priorities and is there a balance toyour life?
Lord, as we journey through life I applaud the people with passions and fortitude to set goals and acheive them. Allow each of us to mentor others to be the best they can be. May we reach those that seems sidelined and bring them encouragement to go after a passion in life. May our first passion always be for You. Amen
So as I'm pushing onward I look back at the young shy girl that was afraid of just about everything and I give glory to God that He overshadowed the hard years and brought forth who I am today. I may not be perfect, thank God, but I am passionate and love encouraging others to be all they want to be.
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Monday, August 6, 2012
Day 29 - Love Yourself
I heard an interesting thing today. If God loves you and I love you then why do you find it hard to love yourself? How true it is. Very few people can honestly say they love themselves. We are a people full of comparison, critical observations and loathing. It seems that even commercials are always pointing to a lack of sufficiency and imperfections. I hardly ever hear someone state how pleased they are in themselves. Even the person that seems to have it all and is put together great can always point to something they wish would improve.
Why is it? Besides the fact that many of us struggle with being 'broken' in terms of contentment there are few that lavish in the love God has so graciously given to us. In my estimation that can be the most 'broken' a person can be. It must grieve the Lord so much when He hears us complaining about our lack of, wish could be, I'd rathers.
Lord, help us to always check our mouths before we dish on your handiwork which is our own individuality. May we all embrace who we are and how perfectly you love us. The best gift we can give you is loving ourselves. Truely loving. Amen
I continue moving along the path, taking in the beauty of nature. Then I realize that in the midst of all this spectacular and breath taking splendor stands the most beautiful creature of all. Me. Thank you God for helping me to love myself even when I don't feel like it. I love because you first loved me. It is how I honor you as Lord of my life.
Why is it? Besides the fact that many of us struggle with being 'broken' in terms of contentment there are few that lavish in the love God has so graciously given to us. In my estimation that can be the most 'broken' a person can be. It must grieve the Lord so much when He hears us complaining about our lack of, wish could be, I'd rathers.
Lord, help us to always check our mouths before we dish on your handiwork which is our own individuality. May we all embrace who we are and how perfectly you love us. The best gift we can give you is loving ourselves. Truely loving. Amen
I continue moving along the path, taking in the beauty of nature. Then I realize that in the midst of all this spectacular and breath taking splendor stands the most beautiful creature of all. Me. Thank you God for helping me to love myself even when I don't feel like it. I love because you first loved me. It is how I honor you as Lord of my life.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Day 28 - Discernment please
I have to admit that in the past I struggled with hypocondrism. My mother was the queen when it came to excessive worrry and fear about every ache and pain. I have leaned on God to help me not have this rule my life. So just before I started this 'broken' blog I experienced an unsettling feeling in my chest. I was determined that it would "go away" but here I am about 6 weeks later and it is still a nagging issue. So much so that this week I will be calling the doctor to see what is going on.
Keeping it real I have had a few bouts of fear and worry press in on me. I had a cardiology appt six months ago and was told I have a strong heart and slight palpatations I was experiencing were nothing to be concerned about. So I'm headed to my GP and see if they can determine the issue or if I'll need to visit the cardiologist again. Brother, what a hassel. I don't have time to make alot of appointments. I am not comfortable in the doctors office anyway so it is just a bit unnerving.
How about you? When the body talks to you and it is obvious that something is wrong how do you react? Are you calm? Do you fret? Do you run to God for discerment and healing or is the first reaction to call the physician?
I've done all the above. So this time around I'm trying very hard to be comfortable in how God leads me. Hopefully it is nothing severe. No matter what my doctor tells me, my great physician is always consulted first and with me constantly.
Lord, help my readers and myself when it comes to worry, fret, dread, fear when it comes to health, finances, employment, etc. Help us to be in constant connection with you and listening to your discernment. Amen
So stay tuned. As I climb the mountain it looks like I have a slight detour ahead.
Keeping it real I have had a few bouts of fear and worry press in on me. I had a cardiology appt six months ago and was told I have a strong heart and slight palpatations I was experiencing were nothing to be concerned about. So I'm headed to my GP and see if they can determine the issue or if I'll need to visit the cardiologist again. Brother, what a hassel. I don't have time to make alot of appointments. I am not comfortable in the doctors office anyway so it is just a bit unnerving.
How about you? When the body talks to you and it is obvious that something is wrong how do you react? Are you calm? Do you fret? Do you run to God for discerment and healing or is the first reaction to call the physician?
I've done all the above. So this time around I'm trying very hard to be comfortable in how God leads me. Hopefully it is nothing severe. No matter what my doctor tells me, my great physician is always consulted first and with me constantly.
Lord, help my readers and myself when it comes to worry, fret, dread, fear when it comes to health, finances, employment, etc. Help us to be in constant connection with you and listening to your discernment. Amen
So stay tuned. As I climb the mountain it looks like I have a slight detour ahead.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Day 27 - Looking Up
My readers, how many of you have struggled with seeking help when you face something you can't handle? I think it is a very human problem to ask for help. Many want to be able to tackle everything life throws at them. I don't think I am alone in this. Seems the longer I live the more apt I am to seek help, though.
I want to encourage my younger readers to learn the skill of relinquishing. Since we know that we need each other to get through life than it stands to reason that we will need God more than we realize. He loves it when we are dependent on Him. So we are going to be at our best, enjoying what we are meant to be when we fall into a complete dependence on Him.
In my life this was not always the case. During some difficult years in the 90's I was totally running my life. I thought I had the world be the tail and didn't need help. I had just come out of a marriage that left me feeling beaten down. I was ready to take charge. After two years of doing my own thing it was no wonder that a jolt would be what it would take to get me back on track. My son's death was a pivitol point in my life turning around.
So looking up is a posture that I keep ever before me. I may not always do everything correctly but I have my life in the hands of the One that is perfectly in love with me. That feels great.
Lord, help me and my readers to completely depend on you for everything and every decision in our lives. Help us to step outside ourselves and see life through Your eyes. Amen
So looking up I keep moving. I know that as I move higher the climb will be met with 'broken' events that will only be healed because I am dependent on Him. Knowing that He is in control fills my heart with joy.
I want to encourage my younger readers to learn the skill of relinquishing. Since we know that we need each other to get through life than it stands to reason that we will need God more than we realize. He loves it when we are dependent on Him. So we are going to be at our best, enjoying what we are meant to be when we fall into a complete dependence on Him.
In my life this was not always the case. During some difficult years in the 90's I was totally running my life. I thought I had the world be the tail and didn't need help. I had just come out of a marriage that left me feeling beaten down. I was ready to take charge. After two years of doing my own thing it was no wonder that a jolt would be what it would take to get me back on track. My son's death was a pivitol point in my life turning around.
So looking up is a posture that I keep ever before me. I may not always do everything correctly but I have my life in the hands of the One that is perfectly in love with me. That feels great.
Lord, help me and my readers to completely depend on you for everything and every decision in our lives. Help us to step outside ourselves and see life through Your eyes. Amen
So looking up I keep moving. I know that as I move higher the climb will be met with 'broken' events that will only be healed because I am dependent on Him. Knowing that He is in control fills my heart with joy.
Friday, August 3, 2012
Day 26 - Tired but pressing on
This has been a very busy week at work and in my prayer time with the Lord. I realize that more things seem to be 'broken' than I thought. I wish I could say that I sense some early healing, but not the case. It seems that with uncovered 'broken' areas has come more deep searching of my soul. In my mind, will and emotions I am stuggling with how to appropriate the goodness of the Lord.
I also have been feeling a really low level of energy. In my physical body I am tired. I wonder if part of it can be a spiritual attack. No matter what it is I need to garner all the strength I can so I can go the distance.
Lord, please allow me to take your words of wisodm and apply them liberally to my life. I long to rest in you. Amen
So today is going to be an easy day up the trail. I want to savor everything about this time. I don't know what is ahead of me but without a doubt trusting God to guide me along is huge.
I also have been feeling a really low level of energy. In my physical body I am tired. I wonder if part of it can be a spiritual attack. No matter what it is I need to garner all the strength I can so I can go the distance.
Lord, please allow me to take your words of wisodm and apply them liberally to my life. I long to rest in you. Amen
So today is going to be an easy day up the trail. I want to savor everything about this time. I don't know what is ahead of me but without a doubt trusting God to guide me along is huge.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
Day 25 - Content
Writing yesterday about being uneasy was hard for me. I never want to be seen as someone who is discontent. The Bible even tells us to be content wherein we find ourselves. So trying to find contentment in all the areas of my life is a challenge. Some days are easier than others and I am sure that many of you know exactly what I mean. You can be sailing through life, days moving into months and then all of a sudden you experience being discontent. I pray that for everyone that has times of difficulty the peace of God can fill your heart and over ride the wavering that ebbs and flows from time to time.
I value the wonderful life I have and know each of my readers do as well. It comes down to counting our many blessings. Even the most 'broken' individual can find the silver lining if we just seek it out. There maybe events and situations that cause us uneasy, discontent and sometimes anger. The biggest challenge in maturity of the spirit is seeking the silver lining and holding on for dear life.
Lord, as we walk through life with struggles and elation help each of us to realize that the lowest times are really when we are closer to You than we think. Uneasy and discontent are just lower marks on our barometer. We give to you our entire lives and know you are with us, everywhere everyday. Amen
My rest along the path has proved great. I have sought the Lord about questions and He instills in my heart that in His time answers will be forth coming. Even if I never find out till I reach Heaven it will be more than alright because I trust God. Trust is the huge key to not only growing but also allowing the healer access to the 'broken' places that need His touch. I see myself reaching out to stand up and imagine the Lord on this path helping me stand. Together we are going onward. I know He's got by back.
I value the wonderful life I have and know each of my readers do as well. It comes down to counting our many blessings. Even the most 'broken' individual can find the silver lining if we just seek it out. There maybe events and situations that cause us uneasy, discontent and sometimes anger. The biggest challenge in maturity of the spirit is seeking the silver lining and holding on for dear life.
Lord, as we walk through life with struggles and elation help each of us to realize that the lowest times are really when we are closer to You than we think. Uneasy and discontent are just lower marks on our barometer. We give to you our entire lives and know you are with us, everywhere everyday. Amen
My rest along the path has proved great. I have sought the Lord about questions and He instills in my heart that in His time answers will be forth coming. Even if I never find out till I reach Heaven it will be more than alright because I trust God. Trust is the huge key to not only growing but also allowing the healer access to the 'broken' places that need His touch. I see myself reaching out to stand up and imagine the Lord on this path helping me stand. Together we are going onward. I know He's got by back.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Day 24 - Uneasy
So talkng trust yesterday and then today in prayer time I am uneasy. Ever had one of those days? Feeling uneasy and really can't focus on why? Well that's great to know I am not alone. I hunkered in for focus in my prayers and admitted to God, I want to change something.
One of the things my husband and I differ on is that he is steady as a rock and change to him is not a comfortable situtaion. I on the other hand am constantly looking to change something. At first I thought it was a trust issue and every time I felt a squeeze to model a behavior or be molded I would wanna change something. Then I realized it had little to do with trust and more to do with satisfaction. I am the first to be appreciative for everything I have because it has taken my entire life to work out some rough spots. But, for example, it seems that the longer I live in my house the more I want to move, I love my job but I'm always reaching for more or upward mobility. I used to just move furntiure around and that was a fix in my home. One career field for over thirty years sounds stable but within that amount of time I lost count of all the differet facets of work I have done.
Today is one of those days. I am fidgety and frustrated. So I offer to the Lord my gypsy heart and ask, "What am I supposed to hear and how am I to get over this?" I am still waiting on an answer. The heavens are quiet. So I pray some more.
If you find yourself doing this, running on a hamster wheel but not getting anywhere, feeling like you wanna do something but can't identify what that would be, hang in there. I am determined to get an answer. I am gonna share it when I hear. But for now, hold on where you are.
Lord, please help my readers and myself with the answer to our delimea. Being unsettled in our spirit is uncomfortable. Please Holy Spirit shine the light on what we need and how to appropriate the solution. Amen
Trekking along its time for a siesta while I wait to hear. The higher I go the better I see. Hopefully my hearing will become heightened as well.
One of the things my husband and I differ on is that he is steady as a rock and change to him is not a comfortable situtaion. I on the other hand am constantly looking to change something. At first I thought it was a trust issue and every time I felt a squeeze to model a behavior or be molded I would wanna change something. Then I realized it had little to do with trust and more to do with satisfaction. I am the first to be appreciative for everything I have because it has taken my entire life to work out some rough spots. But, for example, it seems that the longer I live in my house the more I want to move, I love my job but I'm always reaching for more or upward mobility. I used to just move furntiure around and that was a fix in my home. One career field for over thirty years sounds stable but within that amount of time I lost count of all the differet facets of work I have done.
Today is one of those days. I am fidgety and frustrated. So I offer to the Lord my gypsy heart and ask, "What am I supposed to hear and how am I to get over this?" I am still waiting on an answer. The heavens are quiet. So I pray some more.
If you find yourself doing this, running on a hamster wheel but not getting anywhere, feeling like you wanna do something but can't identify what that would be, hang in there. I am determined to get an answer. I am gonna share it when I hear. But for now, hold on where you are.
Lord, please help my readers and myself with the answer to our delimea. Being unsettled in our spirit is uncomfortable. Please Holy Spirit shine the light on what we need and how to appropriate the solution. Amen
Trekking along its time for a siesta while I wait to hear. The higher I go the better I see. Hopefully my hearing will become heightened as well.
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