Well it's the time for Olympic Summer Games and the stories of these athletes and their journey to gold is very inspiring. It made me stop and evaluate what in my life I could "go for gold" in. It is obvious that it will not be sporting events but the Bible admonishes us to "run the race in such a way as to win the prize". So after praying I understood my race at present is this study on 'broken' and the finish line, the prize, is another 342 days away when the year is complete.
I know that there will be days I am not in the mood to blog about what God is doing, saying, or maybe even when I'm hearing nothing. But I'm in this to win and to have God enlighten me in every aspect of 'broken' as possible. I want injured areas healed and I want more than anything to be an encouragement to many.
So today as I was praying I asked God what was on His heart for me. The Lord took me to Psalm 84. The psalm speaks to the utter joy in worship and adoration of God. How blessed it is to be in the court of His grace and goodness. It ends with a realization that God does not withhold any good thing from those who walk uprightly. How blessed is the man who trusts in God.
Lord, help me be genuine and whole hearted in my praise and worship before You. Look on my heart and know that I long to love you deeper and serve as you position me in this world and with the people whom I encounter. Even more help me to trust again. This has been huge for me and I know for many of my readers. Walk us all through the events that stoled our trust and how You will bring healing. Amen
So as I'm journeying on the path before me I am mulling around the topic of trust. Yes, it could be another year long word study. The basis of this element to life is very much imbedded in some of my 'broken' areas. I know that it is true for many besides myself. So as the Lord tweezes out the splinters that have shaved trust away I am counting on healing balm to close the wounds and restore me to full reliance on God. Do you have trust issues? Are there places or people that have caused trust to be lost? I am going to tackle this as I lean on where he brought me in the word..."How blessed is the man who trusts in Thee" Psalm 84:12 I wanna be blessed. How about you?
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
Day 22 - New Friends
My dear readers,
Today my blog is going to be short. I had a fabulous work day getting caught up and making some appointments. Then it was off to the airport to pick up my new Italian friends who arrived for a month in Texas. We took them to the camp where they will be serving with the love of Christ before returning to Dallas and then a flight to Chicago and then going back home to Florence, Italy.
It was a good trip with them in the car and learning to communicate. Now it is off to bed for some good sleep.
Lord, I pray that you keep my new friends in your loving care as they minister at the camp. I pray for everyone they come in contact to feel how big their hearts are for the Lord. Thank you for increasing my friends circle by two. Amen
Chow!
Today my blog is going to be short. I had a fabulous work day getting caught up and making some appointments. Then it was off to the airport to pick up my new Italian friends who arrived for a month in Texas. We took them to the camp where they will be serving with the love of Christ before returning to Dallas and then a flight to Chicago and then going back home to Florence, Italy.
It was a good trip with them in the car and learning to communicate. Now it is off to bed for some good sleep.
Lord, I pray that you keep my new friends in your loving care as they minister at the camp. I pray for everyone they come in contact to feel how big their hearts are for the Lord. Thank you for increasing my friends circle by two. Amen
Chow!
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Day 21 - Sharpen Hearing
I loved today's message at church. It was about Saul and his conversion process. Most importantly about Ananias. On 'hearing' a word command from God, 'go and heal him', he went.
The statement made by Pastor was, "your hearing gets really good when you can't see". Wow, great since as Christians we know we are to walk by faith not by sight. It seems no matter what sense the human body is without, other senses make up for in a keen way. So when Saul was blinded on the road to Damascus he needed to be led around, into town and to a house where he could be alone to pray and hear. He would wait for an obedient messenger to come with healing. His hearing became acute. This had to happen before the man Saul, later Paul, went on to write most of the New Testament.
I think of how much we need to spiritually be blinded so that our faith can take us where we won't go due to how we perceive things. We see and then we fear and the battle has started to get us to give up.
I was determined to not give into fear for this in depth word study. I know that God has a plan and trusting Him to guide me, protect me and heal me is part of the overall end result. If I was to fear what might be exposed or what I might have to deal with in my past or present I never would have started. Especially not on the internet for the world to read. God will no doubt reveal private things, circumstances, events, mistakes, disobedience and less than charming attitudes. But in order to become a person of purpose and destiny will require the expulsion of things blocking fruit from growing.
This is real and I am no different than you, my reader. We all stumble on the path of life. No one is perfect. Grace is needed new every morning. My hope is that as I get into the nitty gritty of my life you also will deal with areas of a similar nature. I want to hear from you if this helps, if you find an answer to something you have been seeking. Just having another person to understand where you are, what you are going through and how to live in freedom is priceless. It's community, relational and how we were meant to live with one another.
Lord, please help us as we lean into hear you. Spiritually let us see with your eyes, not ours. Take away the things that keep us in bondage to fear. Show how small victories can propel us to even larger undertakings. Amen
So as I continue my trek I'm hearing along the way. I am committed to doing what I hear the Lord saying. I want to be found faithful to execute orders at His command, without discussing the validity of how to get it done. It is losing control, in a good way. Speak Lord for your servant is listening.
The statement made by Pastor was, "your hearing gets really good when you can't see". Wow, great since as Christians we know we are to walk by faith not by sight. It seems no matter what sense the human body is without, other senses make up for in a keen way. So when Saul was blinded on the road to Damascus he needed to be led around, into town and to a house where he could be alone to pray and hear. He would wait for an obedient messenger to come with healing. His hearing became acute. This had to happen before the man Saul, later Paul, went on to write most of the New Testament.
I think of how much we need to spiritually be blinded so that our faith can take us where we won't go due to how we perceive things. We see and then we fear and the battle has started to get us to give up.
I was determined to not give into fear for this in depth word study. I know that God has a plan and trusting Him to guide me, protect me and heal me is part of the overall end result. If I was to fear what might be exposed or what I might have to deal with in my past or present I never would have started. Especially not on the internet for the world to read. God will no doubt reveal private things, circumstances, events, mistakes, disobedience and less than charming attitudes. But in order to become a person of purpose and destiny will require the expulsion of things blocking fruit from growing.
This is real and I am no different than you, my reader. We all stumble on the path of life. No one is perfect. Grace is needed new every morning. My hope is that as I get into the nitty gritty of my life you also will deal with areas of a similar nature. I want to hear from you if this helps, if you find an answer to something you have been seeking. Just having another person to understand where you are, what you are going through and how to live in freedom is priceless. It's community, relational and how we were meant to live with one another.
Lord, please help us as we lean into hear you. Spiritually let us see with your eyes, not ours. Take away the things that keep us in bondage to fear. Show how small victories can propel us to even larger undertakings. Amen
So as I continue my trek I'm hearing along the way. I am committed to doing what I hear the Lord saying. I want to be found faithful to execute orders at His command, without discussing the validity of how to get it done. It is losing control, in a good way. Speak Lord for your servant is listening.
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Day 20 - Passion that fuels
Well I am happy to report that in the corporate event this weekend I was very successful in not speaking at inappropriate times and accepting authority without conflict. To be honest there were no times of clashing authority. The presentations were excellent and highly motivational. I am excited where our company is headed and the great team of partners we have on our team. We are positioned to be able to present the highest quality predicts and services for dentists. I could see that the same passion I have for my career was translated by every partner that presented to us. That is refreshing.
For me it has always been about the 'why' which was repeated many times this weekend. The why you do something is hugely important. If you don't know the why for what you do in life you simply won't be able to stay the course of life. The why is what keeps you keeping on when there is adversity, struggles, hard times, disappointment. For me I am very proud that dentistry has been my 'why' for over 30 years. I began when I was a single mom of four children under five years old, living with my mother and existing on WIC supplement checks and food stamps. Those were hard times. If you would have told me then that I would be in a career over 30 years later enjoying some huge success and with a very impressive resume I would have not thought it possible.
I look back at a very 'broken' young woman age twenty-four, divorced (twice) by the same man, four children under five years old, no higher education and minimal clerical skills to offer the job market. She resigned to live with her mother due to no job and the only income a welfare check of $264 a month. She could have moaned and moped around about a hard life but not the case. People described her as full of zeal and with a zest for life unseen considering her circumstances. All it took was a good friend to recommend that she interview for a soon to be vacant receptionist position at a dental office. Risking everything and knowing that the job would not pay more than it would cost for daycare she went for it. She got the job and her passion for self-improvement took off. She reached for the next step, raising the bar for what she wanted to accomplish, never settling for what job was in front of her. Wow, that is passion fueled by drive and determination.
How about you? Are you working at a job that you love and seek ways to keep raising the bar? Or are you moping around, discontent, just surviving? I hope you are using the fuel of passion to push yourself to be more, do more, strive to be the best and better everyday. I have and I do and I always will. I'm not through raising bars. On this journey, come along with me and raise your bar a notch.
Lord, I pray that you will help me keep reaching and that you will bless my readers. If they are stuck help them see that passion and ignite it again. For those that have little hope may they remember the girl who thirty years ago was almost overtaken by some harsh circumstances but instead met the world with zest. Give it to us all Lord. More Holy Spirit zeal! Amen
So traveling along today I'm kicking a few pebbles, singing a tune and gazing in wonder. I am remembering where I was, excited at where I am but raising the bar for where I want to go.
For me it has always been about the 'why' which was repeated many times this weekend. The why you do something is hugely important. If you don't know the why for what you do in life you simply won't be able to stay the course of life. The why is what keeps you keeping on when there is adversity, struggles, hard times, disappointment. For me I am very proud that dentistry has been my 'why' for over 30 years. I began when I was a single mom of four children under five years old, living with my mother and existing on WIC supplement checks and food stamps. Those were hard times. If you would have told me then that I would be in a career over 30 years later enjoying some huge success and with a very impressive resume I would have not thought it possible.
I look back at a very 'broken' young woman age twenty-four, divorced (twice) by the same man, four children under five years old, no higher education and minimal clerical skills to offer the job market. She resigned to live with her mother due to no job and the only income a welfare check of $264 a month. She could have moaned and moped around about a hard life but not the case. People described her as full of zeal and with a zest for life unseen considering her circumstances. All it took was a good friend to recommend that she interview for a soon to be vacant receptionist position at a dental office. Risking everything and knowing that the job would not pay more than it would cost for daycare she went for it. She got the job and her passion for self-improvement took off. She reached for the next step, raising the bar for what she wanted to accomplish, never settling for what job was in front of her. Wow, that is passion fueled by drive and determination.
How about you? Are you working at a job that you love and seek ways to keep raising the bar? Or are you moping around, discontent, just surviving? I hope you are using the fuel of passion to push yourself to be more, do more, strive to be the best and better everyday. I have and I do and I always will. I'm not through raising bars. On this journey, come along with me and raise your bar a notch.
Lord, I pray that you will help me keep reaching and that you will bless my readers. If they are stuck help them see that passion and ignite it again. For those that have little hope may they remember the girl who thirty years ago was almost overtaken by some harsh circumstances but instead met the world with zest. Give it to us all Lord. More Holy Spirit zeal! Amen
So traveling along today I'm kicking a few pebbles, singing a tune and gazing in wonder. I am remembering where I was, excited at where I am but raising the bar for where I want to go.
Friday, July 27, 2012
Day 19 - Remembering Paul
Today has been a day of great information from Vendors at our corporate event. I also had the opportunity to meet some new work friends and catch up with other friends. It is also opening day for the Olympics and I love the pagentry of this event.
But I got another treat today in my e-mail inbox. It involves an area of 'broken' that I know God will have me deal with in greater measure on this year journey. Today, however, it was good news about a very dark time in my life that happened sixteen years ago. That was the year I lost my oldest child at the age of twenty-one.
Since then I have gone through my stages of grief and in the process I wrote about the hardest time of my life. I had the story published and today I learned that it is going to be published again. It is my way of remembering Paul and never letting what God did diminish. It was a horrific time but as only God can do He brought joy back into my life.
With very little time to blog today I will just offer a prayer and then allow God to bring out the whole story of Paul at a later time.
Lord, thank you for the gift of children. Just as you love us we have the chance and great role to also love creation you bring forth from a mothers womb and place into our care and keeping. I am proud to be such a mother!
So onward for more training tomorrow and then another blog as my journey contines.
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Day 18 - To the Test
Well I'm writing just before heading out to a huge corporate meeting for our region. It promises to be excellent and tons of great information. I'm looking forward to seeing people I've not seen for awhile and to meet others I have yet to meet since being employed with my company. I also get the opportunity to practice....submitting to authority. Yepiee!
Now don't get me wrong. I am good when it comes to most authority. It seems my hardest struggle is when I know that I'm correct and the other view is just plain ridiculous or not appropriate. I tend to get a bit stuck in my way. Keeping it honest here, I lock my feet and dig in. I try not to come off uncompromising because I will for the sake of agreement but not if I know it is not correct, moral, ethical or legal. I have a moral compass and when it senses error I have signals that go off like sirens on a fire truck. I jump on the defense and this is where I get in trouble.
So I am going to practice my authority surrender and try to go with the flow. Like my favorite character from the movie "Kelley's Hero's," Donald Sutherland....."I don't want to go making those negative waves." I am going to practice quiet and speak when called upon. This is not a time for me to have a grand idea that has to be brought before the group. Wow, doesn't this plan sound awesome? Let's see if I can walk it out.
Have you ever been like me? Felt you had to say something even when it goes against the grain of the majority? As timid and shy as I was in my youth I have morphed into quite the contrary. Have you? Well I know I'm not alone in this but I also know that God wants us to be a reflection of him. He wants us to get out of the temple overturning the tables of the money changers and mingle meeting the needs of humanity.
Lord, go before me this weekend and station your angels around me as I gather with my work associates. Help me to shine like you, not be an embarrassment, be your hands and feet where needed and keep my mouth shut. Help my readers who are struggling with this. It can be very debilitating and we want a radiance that causes people to feel peaceful in our presence. Amen
So I'm geared up with the Word in me and a passion to bring the kingdom into lives when and where I can. So here I go. Wish me luck and prayers appreciated.
Now don't get me wrong. I am good when it comes to most authority. It seems my hardest struggle is when I know that I'm correct and the other view is just plain ridiculous or not appropriate. I tend to get a bit stuck in my way. Keeping it honest here, I lock my feet and dig in. I try not to come off uncompromising because I will for the sake of agreement but not if I know it is not correct, moral, ethical or legal. I have a moral compass and when it senses error I have signals that go off like sirens on a fire truck. I jump on the defense and this is where I get in trouble.
So I am going to practice my authority surrender and try to go with the flow. Like my favorite character from the movie "Kelley's Hero's," Donald Sutherland....."I don't want to go making those negative waves." I am going to practice quiet and speak when called upon. This is not a time for me to have a grand idea that has to be brought before the group. Wow, doesn't this plan sound awesome? Let's see if I can walk it out.
Have you ever been like me? Felt you had to say something even when it goes against the grain of the majority? As timid and shy as I was in my youth I have morphed into quite the contrary. Have you? Well I know I'm not alone in this but I also know that God wants us to be a reflection of him. He wants us to get out of the temple overturning the tables of the money changers and mingle meeting the needs of humanity.
Lord, go before me this weekend and station your angels around me as I gather with my work associates. Help me to shine like you, not be an embarrassment, be your hands and feet where needed and keep my mouth shut. Help my readers who are struggling with this. It can be very debilitating and we want a radiance that causes people to feel peaceful in our presence. Amen
So I'm geared up with the Word in me and a passion to bring the kingdom into lives when and where I can. So here I go. Wish me luck and prayers appreciated.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Day 17 - Straight lines
How many of my readers out there remember the child toy, Etch-a-sketch? It was so much fun to draw lines and shapes using the two white knobs and then shake it to start over. No need for tablets of paper when you could draw, create and just clear the screen to begin again. As I was praying today I don't know why I thought about this toy. Maybe I wanted to know if God could clear my life screen of all the wrong directions and help me start again. I realize that isn't possible but I can make sure that from here forward my lines of choice I walk are purposeful and in unison with His plan.
I really didn't elaborate yesterday about the revelation in regards to my issue with authority. I wish I could say that just turning it over to God was all that He requires. I know that to be far from the truth. There is an action I am going to have to exercise in walking out a new discipline.
I prayed about where it went wrong. Growing up in a house with a perfectionist father taught me that never hearing praise meant I wasn't good enough. I tried so many things thinking it would bring approval and praise. Nothing. Have you been there? Working, striving, literally killing yourself for recognition and getting nothing? You would think that after awhile we would just resign ourself to what it is and move on. No, not me. How about you? How many of you are still chasing the approval of someone? It doesn't have to be a parent, could be a spouse, boss, co-worker, you name them. It never dawned on me in the all those years that I had all I was craving from my heavenly Father. I just had to receive His approving, unconditional love by appropriating it.
I had been to Vacation Bible School, Sunday School and heard sermon after sermon repeating the same thing. God loves you. He cares. He will always be there. But you know as good as that sounded He wasn't in my real, down to earth, life and I needed some arms around me, voices speaking affirmation. I needed to feel worth taking up space. Instead life groaned on with days turning into years and years into decades and now finally I am learning to be a peace with who I am. It all starts with not rebelling against authority but in fact embracing it.
Lord, help my readers and myself with our issues in this arena. For me it has been years coming but for my readers it might have just begun. Help all of us to rest in You. May we honor the authority You play in our life and relinquish our control of things over to You. Amen
So trudging along the path I'm convinced that yielding to His authority and control sets me free. I am not in bondage any longer and can use the power I gain from submitting to fuel my rebuilding. The 'broken' internal power struggle is now given over to Jesus. For me my etch-a-sketch has been shaken and Jesus is turning the knobs, making straight my path. Where I am headed next is as exciting as watching my feet moving forward. Glad you are here with me. I love you my friends.
I really didn't elaborate yesterday about the revelation in regards to my issue with authority. I wish I could say that just turning it over to God was all that He requires. I know that to be far from the truth. There is an action I am going to have to exercise in walking out a new discipline.
I prayed about where it went wrong. Growing up in a house with a perfectionist father taught me that never hearing praise meant I wasn't good enough. I tried so many things thinking it would bring approval and praise. Nothing. Have you been there? Working, striving, literally killing yourself for recognition and getting nothing? You would think that after awhile we would just resign ourself to what it is and move on. No, not me. How about you? How many of you are still chasing the approval of someone? It doesn't have to be a parent, could be a spouse, boss, co-worker, you name them. It never dawned on me in the all those years that I had all I was craving from my heavenly Father. I just had to receive His approving, unconditional love by appropriating it.
I had been to Vacation Bible School, Sunday School and heard sermon after sermon repeating the same thing. God loves you. He cares. He will always be there. But you know as good as that sounded He wasn't in my real, down to earth, life and I needed some arms around me, voices speaking affirmation. I needed to feel worth taking up space. Instead life groaned on with days turning into years and years into decades and now finally I am learning to be a peace with who I am. It all starts with not rebelling against authority but in fact embracing it.
Lord, help my readers and myself with our issues in this arena. For me it has been years coming but for my readers it might have just begun. Help all of us to rest in You. May we honor the authority You play in our life and relinquish our control of things over to You. Amen
So trudging along the path I'm convinced that yielding to His authority and control sets me free. I am not in bondage any longer and can use the power I gain from submitting to fuel my rebuilding. The 'broken' internal power struggle is now given over to Jesus. For me my etch-a-sketch has been shaken and Jesus is turning the knobs, making straight my path. Where I am headed next is as exciting as watching my feet moving forward. Glad you are here with me. I love you my friends.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Day 16 - Sandpaper People
Well I didn't expect today to begin with tackling a major 'broken' area of my life but that is exactly what happened. Early this morning while praying my mind drifted to a situation at work. Don't you just hate it when you are trying to read and your mind wanders? Is it because we are so busy? Is it because we are always muti-tasking? When I am praying I like to stay focused on my spiritual dialogue with the Lord. This was no time for my mind to drift to work of all places. But when it happened I was quick to ask the Lord,"Why? Are you trying to show me something?" Yep, you guessed it. The answer was, yes!
I'm going to talk about sandpaper people. If you are asking me what I mean, you probably don't have any or not yet. Sandpaper people are those individuals that rub us the wrong way. The grate against us like nails on a chalkboard. We experience this reaction usually during an initial contact. We meet them and something just sets you crosswise. It can be puzzling why we are reacting in such a manner.
Years ago I had a friend tell me that when this happens to look closely at the person. Often times the very thing in them that sends hairs upright on our skin is something in ourselves we don't like. Ouch! You have got to be kidding. But I have taken to doing this evaluation and sure enough, in a majority or situations it is true. As much as I hate to admit it I see the character flaw in myself reflected in the other person.
Today's mind drifting episode for me was due to this very situation. I am in contact with an individual that rubs me the wrong way, all the time. I am in a very irritating situation with them and it centers around a power struggle. Now I like to see myself as kind, gentle, soft spoken, etc. Deep inside I am that person just like I have a wonderful six-pack of muscles beneath this tummy of fluff. However, cross me and I can resurrect the old carnal man really fast. When I know I am right about something it can make it even worse.
So today I took the prayer time to plead my pitiful case to God about why I am right in this situation. All I heard in return was, "You have a problem with authority." No, not me. I bowed my head, tears welling up in my eyes and admitted, "Yes I do." I wanted to justify my admission of guilt but knew it wasn't necessary. God knows everything about me. Today His finger pointed directly to a tough area of 'broken.' Wow, so much for the past few days of quiet from the throne. I should have guessed something difficult was around the corner.
I had determined years ago after many hardships in my life that I would never be "told" what to do, ever again. I battle with this, daily. Every male figure in my life at one time or another got a chance to point a finger and tell me what to do. There were few times of discussion and choices, only directives and orders. I went from being a shy, introverted doormat to a opinionated, stern task master. There is nothing I like about admitting sin but I know the only way to healing is getting it out in the open and illuminated so it can be dealt with as the Lord chooses.
Lord, help me to submit to you and in the process learn how to submit to authority in a manner that is consistent with your nature. Teach me to know when it is something that truly needs my voice and when I should stay silent. I want to be gentle and humble. I hate battling this. Grow a heart attitude in me that is grateful for leadership and those I should respect in authority positions. Amen
I looked around at the many stones along the mountain path, even the ones I'd gathered. I realized that I couldn't gather them all and carry them with me on this journey. I sat down and along the path edge I offered them all to God as pieces of me. I am confident that the very ugly pieces of 'broken' will be crafted by God into something wonderful. So I laid aside the weight that was entangling me and marked this spot where I relinquished control to the one true authority. I stood up, dusted off my pants and headed onward.
I'm going to talk about sandpaper people. If you are asking me what I mean, you probably don't have any or not yet. Sandpaper people are those individuals that rub us the wrong way. The grate against us like nails on a chalkboard. We experience this reaction usually during an initial contact. We meet them and something just sets you crosswise. It can be puzzling why we are reacting in such a manner.
Years ago I had a friend tell me that when this happens to look closely at the person. Often times the very thing in them that sends hairs upright on our skin is something in ourselves we don't like. Ouch! You have got to be kidding. But I have taken to doing this evaluation and sure enough, in a majority or situations it is true. As much as I hate to admit it I see the character flaw in myself reflected in the other person.
Today's mind drifting episode for me was due to this very situation. I am in contact with an individual that rubs me the wrong way, all the time. I am in a very irritating situation with them and it centers around a power struggle. Now I like to see myself as kind, gentle, soft spoken, etc. Deep inside I am that person just like I have a wonderful six-pack of muscles beneath this tummy of fluff. However, cross me and I can resurrect the old carnal man really fast. When I know I am right about something it can make it even worse.
So today I took the prayer time to plead my pitiful case to God about why I am right in this situation. All I heard in return was, "You have a problem with authority." No, not me. I bowed my head, tears welling up in my eyes and admitted, "Yes I do." I wanted to justify my admission of guilt but knew it wasn't necessary. God knows everything about me. Today His finger pointed directly to a tough area of 'broken.' Wow, so much for the past few days of quiet from the throne. I should have guessed something difficult was around the corner.
I had determined years ago after many hardships in my life that I would never be "told" what to do, ever again. I battle with this, daily. Every male figure in my life at one time or another got a chance to point a finger and tell me what to do. There were few times of discussion and choices, only directives and orders. I went from being a shy, introverted doormat to a opinionated, stern task master. There is nothing I like about admitting sin but I know the only way to healing is getting it out in the open and illuminated so it can be dealt with as the Lord chooses.
Lord, help me to submit to you and in the process learn how to submit to authority in a manner that is consistent with your nature. Teach me to know when it is something that truly needs my voice and when I should stay silent. I want to be gentle and humble. I hate battling this. Grow a heart attitude in me that is grateful for leadership and those I should respect in authority positions. Amen
I looked around at the many stones along the mountain path, even the ones I'd gathered. I realized that I couldn't gather them all and carry them with me on this journey. I sat down and along the path edge I offered them all to God as pieces of me. I am confident that the very ugly pieces of 'broken' will be crafted by God into something wonderful. So I laid aside the weight that was entangling me and marked this spot where I relinquished control to the one true authority. I stood up, dusted off my pants and headed onward.
Monday, July 23, 2012
Day 15 - Don't get discouraged
Today was a day I could have gotten discouraged but instead took hope from the fact this will be a long journey, full of surprises. My tendency is to want to rush the process instead of taking this course at His pace.
Haven't you felt that way at times? You want the end result and in a hurry up fashion. I am learning to relax and wait on the Lord. I am confident in my spirit that my very life is being directed by Him.
So today was busy from a professional stand point. I was able to spend time in prayer and praise as I drove along and as I exercised at the gym. Home to make dinner, do the dishes and make some brownies. It is now time for my blog.
In reading today I was taking inventory of some really tough times as they came to my mind. There is so much and will be revealing how the Lord works through the mire of my life. I know that you may or may not see yourself in some of my 'broken' life. I will share with candor knowing that someone will be blessed beyond myself. Today is another day of praise in preparation for what is to come.
In Nehemiah's rebuilding project he set specific people in charge of specific areas to rebuild. They not only did the work but also guarded the rebuilding process from enemy invaders.
It's how I will have to do when the rebuilding begins in my life. You will be the same. We will have to guard against the enemy attempting to destroy the rebuild.
Lord I submit to you my waiting, postured as peaceful rest. As you enlighten me to areas that are 'broken' help me to learn in the process exactly what the kingdom purpose is for how to use the pieces of my life. Amen
My journey is continuing, like the turtle....slow and steady.
Haven't you felt that way at times? You want the end result and in a hurry up fashion. I am learning to relax and wait on the Lord. I am confident in my spirit that my very life is being directed by Him.
So today was busy from a professional stand point. I was able to spend time in prayer and praise as I drove along and as I exercised at the gym. Home to make dinner, do the dishes and make some brownies. It is now time for my blog.
In reading today I was taking inventory of some really tough times as they came to my mind. There is so much and will be revealing how the Lord works through the mire of my life. I know that you may or may not see yourself in some of my 'broken' life. I will share with candor knowing that someone will be blessed beyond myself. Today is another day of praise in preparation for what is to come.
In Nehemiah's rebuilding project he set specific people in charge of specific areas to rebuild. They not only did the work but also guarded the rebuilding process from enemy invaders.
It's how I will have to do when the rebuilding begins in my life. You will be the same. We will have to guard against the enemy attempting to destroy the rebuild.
Lord I submit to you my waiting, postured as peaceful rest. As you enlighten me to areas that are 'broken' help me to learn in the process exactly what the kingdom purpose is for how to use the pieces of my life. Amen
My journey is continuing, like the turtle....slow and steady.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Day 14 - A Day of Rest
As you my reader are reading this I don't know if it is Sunday where you are. It is afternoon here, a day of rest, but it seems I am always busy. Today I needed to get things done before the work week, as I am sure it happens in your life too. This Sunday is a relatively calm and uneventful day.
I know that this journey of "broken" will have many uneventful days and for that I am learning to rest. Even though I know the Lord is always at work in my life it helps to know that there are days when calm happens and we can all catch our breath.
In honor of resting I thought I'd share another "broken" life with you and summarize today's message from church. It is about a Bible character, Rahab. For those Bible scholars in the audience you are shaking your head, yep, there is a huge broken life. For those that are not familiar with her, she was a harlot. She was the lowest of the low and broken fit her well. But she played a significant part in the overtaking of Jericho. For her service and faith she is spared death. God does a real work in her life. She even goes on to be in the lineage of Jesus. Wow! I will never do the sermon justice but pretty incredible stuff.
Lord, Thank you for the way You are always looking to redeem our lives. You are constantly guarding us and will see that every enemy we face is ultimately defeated. Even through our struggles, disappointments, addictions and temptations you are prepared to show us the victory.
So in collecting pieces of stone from my mountain journey I realize that they represent pieces of me. A little broken here and a little broken there. I know that like in Jerusalem You will use them all to rebuild my life. I know because I was fearfully and wonderfully made. What happened to cause fissures, cracks and breaks were not meant to destroy the parts of me You knit by Your hands. So as I gather my pocket full of rocks. I submit them to You as the unique parts of my personality that were battered, beaten, shaken, rejected, criticized. I'm excited to know what the new me is capable of being and doing. I am prostrate before you, fully committed to the rebuilding process as a obedient act of my will.
In loving devotion, through the good and the bad, the happy and the sad, for better or even when it feels like worse. I pledge to You, my Lord, my life.
I know that this journey of "broken" will have many uneventful days and for that I am learning to rest. Even though I know the Lord is always at work in my life it helps to know that there are days when calm happens and we can all catch our breath.
In honor of resting I thought I'd share another "broken" life with you and summarize today's message from church. It is about a Bible character, Rahab. For those Bible scholars in the audience you are shaking your head, yep, there is a huge broken life. For those that are not familiar with her, she was a harlot. She was the lowest of the low and broken fit her well. But she played a significant part in the overtaking of Jericho. For her service and faith she is spared death. God does a real work in her life. She even goes on to be in the lineage of Jesus. Wow! I will never do the sermon justice but pretty incredible stuff.
Lord, Thank you for the way You are always looking to redeem our lives. You are constantly guarding us and will see that every enemy we face is ultimately defeated. Even through our struggles, disappointments, addictions and temptations you are prepared to show us the victory.
So in collecting pieces of stone from my mountain journey I realize that they represent pieces of me. A little broken here and a little broken there. I know that like in Jerusalem You will use them all to rebuild my life. I know because I was fearfully and wonderfully made. What happened to cause fissures, cracks and breaks were not meant to destroy the parts of me You knit by Your hands. So as I gather my pocket full of rocks. I submit them to You as the unique parts of my personality that were battered, beaten, shaken, rejected, criticized. I'm excited to know what the new me is capable of being and doing. I am prostrate before you, fully committed to the rebuilding process as a obedient act of my will.
In loving devotion, through the good and the bad, the happy and the sad, for better or even when it feels like worse. I pledge to You, my Lord, my life.
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Day 13 - Fan the Ember
It is a very quiet morning and I've just finished some time awake, alone. Coffee was good but listening in my spirit is invigorating as I prepare for the day.
When I left you yesterday I was looking back, evaluating the present and wondering about what lies ahead. Reflecting can be discouraging, depressing and leave you feeling hopeless, unless you have had a tremendous life. We all do this from time to time.
Today, I was continuing in the Book of Nehemiah and the story of the rebuilding. I was struck at how poorly the remnant felt after surviving captivity. I know I would feel pretty discouraged. Without anyone to help them see tomorrow and get them up and moving I wonder what would have become of them. But the story does have such a person. Nehemiah was the one who felt such a passion for his people that he was bold enough to approach the King and ask to go to them, help them rebuild the city. Once allowed to go he makes the journey, arrives and then surveys the damage. He then proclaims to the people, the remnant, "It is a bad situation, the city is desolate, but come, let us rebuild, so we are no longer in disgrace." He was fanning the ember of hope he recognized in them. They were survivors and they needed to hear that hope lives on, much life to live, things yet to do and generations to inspire. Nehemiah goes on to tell them how God had been favorable toward him and in addition, about the kings approval, directive and equipping. He then charged them to "arise and build."
I know you, my reader, are like me. There are times that circumstances overwhelm and giving up seems better than fighting an uphill battle. All confidence and desire can burn out. But embers are powerful. They are tiny remnants of the larger fire and they can burn on looking, waiting for a moment to ignite again.
What is that thing that you have all but given up on? What is hanging on by a thread to hope? Has a Nehemiah come into your life and tried to get you "up and going?" Are you looking at the ruin around you, determined that it will never change? I bring you hope. I'll fan the ember in you. "Arise!"
Lord, thank you that we have the Holy Spirit that is daily fanning embers in our lives. Overcoming adversity in life is a daily event and we know that you promised we would experience trouble. Help us to take our eyes off the things, situations and ordeals that surround us and get our eyes on You. You are making a way for us, speaking to us if we would only take the time to hear and You are stoking the embers while the Spirit is blowing the billows to ignite us. Touch my readers. Help them to not be discouraged but hopeful. Get us busy rebuilding. Amen
So I've decided to get up, plant my boots to the path and look around me for what I can use to rebuild. As the Lord helps me see 'broken' places that need rebuilt, I'll be ready.
When I left you yesterday I was looking back, evaluating the present and wondering about what lies ahead. Reflecting can be discouraging, depressing and leave you feeling hopeless, unless you have had a tremendous life. We all do this from time to time.
Today, I was continuing in the Book of Nehemiah and the story of the rebuilding. I was struck at how poorly the remnant felt after surviving captivity. I know I would feel pretty discouraged. Without anyone to help them see tomorrow and get them up and moving I wonder what would have become of them. But the story does have such a person. Nehemiah was the one who felt such a passion for his people that he was bold enough to approach the King and ask to go to them, help them rebuild the city. Once allowed to go he makes the journey, arrives and then surveys the damage. He then proclaims to the people, the remnant, "It is a bad situation, the city is desolate, but come, let us rebuild, so we are no longer in disgrace." He was fanning the ember of hope he recognized in them. They were survivors and they needed to hear that hope lives on, much life to live, things yet to do and generations to inspire. Nehemiah goes on to tell them how God had been favorable toward him and in addition, about the kings approval, directive and equipping. He then charged them to "arise and build."
I know you, my reader, are like me. There are times that circumstances overwhelm and giving up seems better than fighting an uphill battle. All confidence and desire can burn out. But embers are powerful. They are tiny remnants of the larger fire and they can burn on looking, waiting for a moment to ignite again.
What is that thing that you have all but given up on? What is hanging on by a thread to hope? Has a Nehemiah come into your life and tried to get you "up and going?" Are you looking at the ruin around you, determined that it will never change? I bring you hope. I'll fan the ember in you. "Arise!"
Lord, thank you that we have the Holy Spirit that is daily fanning embers in our lives. Overcoming adversity in life is a daily event and we know that you promised we would experience trouble. Help us to take our eyes off the things, situations and ordeals that surround us and get our eyes on You. You are making a way for us, speaking to us if we would only take the time to hear and You are stoking the embers while the Spirit is blowing the billows to ignite us. Touch my readers. Help them to not be discouraged but hopeful. Get us busy rebuilding. Amen
So I've decided to get up, plant my boots to the path and look around me for what I can use to rebuild. As the Lord helps me see 'broken' places that need rebuilt, I'll be ready.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Day 12 - The heart of the matter
I awoke this morning to the disturbing news from Colorado about a gunman killing people at a theatre. It was front and center on every channel, web page, tweet, etc. I prayed and thought of all the dead, the wounded and the gunman. A local pastor was interviewed and he summed it up best when he quoted from scripture about the heart of man. He mentioned that when people ask why is this happening now? It is not that evil has just arrived, we have lived with evil around us from the fall of Adam. In Genesis 8:21 it states, "...for the intent of man's heart is evil from his youth.." God was commenting after the flood waters had subsided. The only persons remaining were Noah and his family. Earlier in Genesis 6:5-6, "..the Lord saw that the wickedness of man was great on the earth, and that every intent of the thoughts of his heart was evil continually. And the Lord was sorry that He had made man on the earth and He was grieved in His heart."
So from the beginning we have had evil around us. The huge difference today is that to atone for the sins and sinfulness of man, God sent His Son to be a blood sacrifice. It is true that in ourselves exists no good thing but through Christ and His work on the cross we have been made in right standing. No person can overcome evil within themselves without claiming that redemptive work, and walking in His grace every day.
So I took a minute literally and figuratively to sit and pray for our world.
Lord, you promised us that we would have tribulations and trials on this mortal sphere we call earth, our temporary residence. Help the light of your powerful presence to shine forth from the people who can bring healing to us as we each experience evil in life. I know it grieves Your heart when evil shows itself. Brokenness is what is left in the wake of the storm. Bring justice and healing to us all. We can't do it without You and need Your guiding light. Amen
I think it best to sit awhile and gaze back at where I have come from, enjoy where I am at, and then look up to what lies ahead. I can't see what is around the path but I know with each step there are angels attending me and the Holy Spirit is mightily at work.
So from the beginning we have had evil around us. The huge difference today is that to atone for the sins and sinfulness of man, God sent His Son to be a blood sacrifice. It is true that in ourselves exists no good thing but through Christ and His work on the cross we have been made in right standing. No person can overcome evil within themselves without claiming that redemptive work, and walking in His grace every day.
So I took a minute literally and figuratively to sit and pray for our world.
Lord, you promised us that we would have tribulations and trials on this mortal sphere we call earth, our temporary residence. Help the light of your powerful presence to shine forth from the people who can bring healing to us as we each experience evil in life. I know it grieves Your heart when evil shows itself. Brokenness is what is left in the wake of the storm. Bring justice and healing to us all. We can't do it without You and need Your guiding light. Amen
I think it best to sit awhile and gaze back at where I have come from, enjoy where I am at, and then look up to what lies ahead. I can't see what is around the path but I know with each step there are angels attending me and the Holy Spirit is mightily at work.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Day 11 - Lead on
I had a good sleep last night but awoke still drained from my jury experience this week. I know with time I will begin to digest the happenings and go on with life. The one good thing that God did show me was where He was leading. I placed a call to a good friend of mine and she is getting me in touch with a person that can set wheels in motion to "put me to work." I am excited, blessed and above all thankful for ALL God did this week. It never fails that He will show out powerful if we just lean in and ask to see the way.
So trekking along on this mountain gave me time to ponder the parable in Matthew 13, Mark 4, Luke 8 - The Sower. We sow everyday. What are we sowing? Often times as 'broken' people we sow out of disfunction and so is it any wonder when dysfunction is what we reap? Consider the soil also; rocky, thorn infested and fertile. To know the seed is the Word, what is the field? People's heart? Their soul (mind, will and emotions)? Oh my! We have an obligation and responsibility to guard what comes out of our mouths and who is hearing.
So I asked the Lord what He wanted to say in this parable in relation to my word study. His response, "speak life." Wow, I wish I could sum up everything I want to say in a nutshell two words. My blogs could be tweets. But all kidding aside it is that simple, speak life. So the exercise for me is to choose my words better, be careful they are life giving and guard the soil that is hearing them. I know I have been guilty of infractions in this area.
Lord, please guard my heart and mind. Put a watch over my lips that moving forward I would choose life-giving, positive, encouraging words. For non life-giving words that I have spoken please negate the effects caused by them and replace with your love in hearers hearts and minds. I ask forgiveness and seek to be your mouth as well as your hands and feet. I will always be a champion for right vs. wrong and any form of injustice, malice, disrespect I see in my circle of influence. Help me to do it with your attributes and Word. Let my life reflect you. Amen
So for the rest of this journey and forward in life the Lord is leading me into speech correction, development and discipline. This is hard but giving my mouth to Him is a good thing. Early in this 'broken' process is perfect timing. But then again I expect everything to be the right time, the right season.
So trekking along on this mountain gave me time to ponder the parable in Matthew 13, Mark 4, Luke 8 - The Sower. We sow everyday. What are we sowing? Often times as 'broken' people we sow out of disfunction and so is it any wonder when dysfunction is what we reap? Consider the soil also; rocky, thorn infested and fertile. To know the seed is the Word, what is the field? People's heart? Their soul (mind, will and emotions)? Oh my! We have an obligation and responsibility to guard what comes out of our mouths and who is hearing.
So I asked the Lord what He wanted to say in this parable in relation to my word study. His response, "speak life." Wow, I wish I could sum up everything I want to say in a nutshell two words. My blogs could be tweets. But all kidding aside it is that simple, speak life. So the exercise for me is to choose my words better, be careful they are life giving and guard the soil that is hearing them. I know I have been guilty of infractions in this area.
Lord, please guard my heart and mind. Put a watch over my lips that moving forward I would choose life-giving, positive, encouraging words. For non life-giving words that I have spoken please negate the effects caused by them and replace with your love in hearers hearts and minds. I ask forgiveness and seek to be your mouth as well as your hands and feet. I will always be a champion for right vs. wrong and any form of injustice, malice, disrespect I see in my circle of influence. Help me to do it with your attributes and Word. Let my life reflect you. Amen
So for the rest of this journey and forward in life the Lord is leading me into speech correction, development and discipline. This is hard but giving my mouth to Him is a good thing. Early in this 'broken' process is perfect timing. But then again I expect everything to be the right time, the right season.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Day 10 - A New Purpose
Well my friends when I left you yesterday, Blog Day 9, with pounding footsteps in the hearing of my nine year-old self I never dreamed where this day would take me. Let me finish the memory and then the greater call before me.
It was a family reunion dinner and all my cousins and myself were outside playing. I was told to keep an eye on my brother who was a toddler at the time. I remember being on the large square cement porch when someone called my name and I turned to acknowledge them with a reply. As I did, I simultaneously heard a thud and scream. Yep, my brother had fallen from the porch head first into a cement-bottomed window well next to the porch. As I scooped him up in my arms and tried hard to get him to quit screaming I could see the goose egg of a bump appear on his forehead. My cousins came running to see what the commotion was all about. It is then I heard the footsteps. The door flew open and my mother grabbed my brother as my father ripped off his leather belt. He proceeded to pull my pants down and lay me across his lap. There in front of family looking on he dealt out blow after blow. No one stopping him. The pain was intense and the humiliation worse. From my knees to my buttocks I was required to wear pants to school to hide the raised welts. The only thing I remember saying as my father appeared in the doorway was, "I didn't mean to! Please don't!"
That memory to this day is as vivid as when it happened. I wish I could say that the years have diminished the pain associated but not so much. I have made the choice to forgive my father but the memory remains mine forever.
As I take footsteps on this 'broken' journey I want to offer to God that my footsteps will always be His to control. My passions given He gave to me have grown and my purpose will be to use everything for Kingdom missions. Today I got another piece.
I have been writing my blogs the last three days late at night because I had to be at jury duty early. I was on a jury for a trial of a young man. I will not discuss the offense, the testimony or the verdict we reached. But in the course of the three days I received verbal accusations by my fellow jury mates and it was traumatic to my spirit. As low as I felt, I did what I always do. I prayed and asked God to take this very thing that was harmful to me and turn it for good. The good was immediately apparent to me.
For over ten years I have worked Walk to Emmaus spiritual weekends for women wanting to draw closer to the Lord. Never would I have considered working these same weekends in a juvenile or adult penal environment. Working with criminals was not for me. But from day one this week, even during jury selection to the entire time I served as a juror it became very apparent to me that is exactly where I was to offer my next years of service.
Lord, I submit to you that through the pain of anything you can work great and might wonders. I have heard and I will obey. Here I am Lord, send me! Amen
So as I take more footsteps along the path and climb this mountain I have also been birthed into a new ministry opportunity and I couldn't be happier or more excited. I am eager to help the 'broken.'
It was a family reunion dinner and all my cousins and myself were outside playing. I was told to keep an eye on my brother who was a toddler at the time. I remember being on the large square cement porch when someone called my name and I turned to acknowledge them with a reply. As I did, I simultaneously heard a thud and scream. Yep, my brother had fallen from the porch head first into a cement-bottomed window well next to the porch. As I scooped him up in my arms and tried hard to get him to quit screaming I could see the goose egg of a bump appear on his forehead. My cousins came running to see what the commotion was all about. It is then I heard the footsteps. The door flew open and my mother grabbed my brother as my father ripped off his leather belt. He proceeded to pull my pants down and lay me across his lap. There in front of family looking on he dealt out blow after blow. No one stopping him. The pain was intense and the humiliation worse. From my knees to my buttocks I was required to wear pants to school to hide the raised welts. The only thing I remember saying as my father appeared in the doorway was, "I didn't mean to! Please don't!"
That memory to this day is as vivid as when it happened. I wish I could say that the years have diminished the pain associated but not so much. I have made the choice to forgive my father but the memory remains mine forever.
As I take footsteps on this 'broken' journey I want to offer to God that my footsteps will always be His to control. My passions given He gave to me have grown and my purpose will be to use everything for Kingdom missions. Today I got another piece.
I have been writing my blogs the last three days late at night because I had to be at jury duty early. I was on a jury for a trial of a young man. I will not discuss the offense, the testimony or the verdict we reached. But in the course of the three days I received verbal accusations by my fellow jury mates and it was traumatic to my spirit. As low as I felt, I did what I always do. I prayed and asked God to take this very thing that was harmful to me and turn it for good. The good was immediately apparent to me.
For over ten years I have worked Walk to Emmaus spiritual weekends for women wanting to draw closer to the Lord. Never would I have considered working these same weekends in a juvenile or adult penal environment. Working with criminals was not for me. But from day one this week, even during jury selection to the entire time I served as a juror it became very apparent to me that is exactly where I was to offer my next years of service.
Lord, I submit to you that through the pain of anything you can work great and might wonders. I have heard and I will obey. Here I am Lord, send me! Amen
So as I take more footsteps along the path and climb this mountain I have also been birthed into a new ministry opportunity and I couldn't be happier or more excited. I am eager to help the 'broken.'
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Day 9, Broken face to face
Again, I'm late today with my post but it's been another long day. You know, we all have them, days that have more to do than hours to do them in. Today was no exception but I was also in the jury box doing my civic duty. I came face to face with 'broken' and it was not about me.
Sitting on a jury is a unique experience. Although I am sworn to not talk about the case I can say that if you want to find 'broken' you need look no further than a courtroom. I'm getting a huge dose of it this week and I pray that God speaks to me as I do my civic duty with integrity.
Looking at myself and pondering my 'broken' areas I seem to find more that need fixing than those that I can honestly say are absolutely fine. Though I have not been arrested or punished for lawlessness I have been on the receiving end of punishment. I was raised in the day when it was fine for parents to meat out discipline. Often times that discipline was harsh, as it was in my case. But you can bet it only happened a few times because I got the message. My fear, in our current society, is that due to 'brokenness' and other factors we have a society of people that feel owed. They are being raised with few boundaries and little consequences. It is definitely a moral decline from when I was young.
I inquired of the Lord, "What is balance?" How to get those who are suffering and out of control to a place of healing and hope. I am right there in many areas. I have asked many times, why? Then, how? I am hoping that this journey will clarify for me as I undergo healing.
Lord, please help me to see with your eyes and hear with your ears. Holy Spirit, guide me and my steps as I come upon areas that you will reveal that need your touch. May I be bold and brave. Amen
So as I'm beginning the ascent I am on the lookout for revelation of the next encounter. I've got a feeling it is coming in the form of footsteps. I can hear them now like I did when I was nine years old. I freeze. I hear my child voice say, "I'm sorry, I only turned my back for a second. Please don't!" But no one stopped what happened next.
Sitting on a jury is a unique experience. Although I am sworn to not talk about the case I can say that if you want to find 'broken' you need look no further than a courtroom. I'm getting a huge dose of it this week and I pray that God speaks to me as I do my civic duty with integrity.
Looking at myself and pondering my 'broken' areas I seem to find more that need fixing than those that I can honestly say are absolutely fine. Though I have not been arrested or punished for lawlessness I have been on the receiving end of punishment. I was raised in the day when it was fine for parents to meat out discipline. Often times that discipline was harsh, as it was in my case. But you can bet it only happened a few times because I got the message. My fear, in our current society, is that due to 'brokenness' and other factors we have a society of people that feel owed. They are being raised with few boundaries and little consequences. It is definitely a moral decline from when I was young.
I inquired of the Lord, "What is balance?" How to get those who are suffering and out of control to a place of healing and hope. I am right there in many areas. I have asked many times, why? Then, how? I am hoping that this journey will clarify for me as I undergo healing.
Lord, please help me to see with your eyes and hear with your ears. Holy Spirit, guide me and my steps as I come upon areas that you will reveal that need your touch. May I be bold and brave. Amen
So as I'm beginning the ascent I am on the lookout for revelation of the next encounter. I've got a feeling it is coming in the form of footsteps. I can hear them now like I did when I was nine years old. I freeze. I hear my child voice say, "I'm sorry, I only turned my back for a second. Please don't!" But no one stopped what happened next.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Day 8, Everything I need I already have
Sorry my blog is late today. I began early going to jury duty. I wish I could say that I did my civic duty and was dismissed but not the case. Please bear with me this week as I blog when I have time.
Beginning the climb into the 'broken' study and in particular my life needed to begin at the beginning as you read yesterday. But no telling how the Holy Spirit is going to guide me through the rest. While reading more about Jeremiah today and his survey of the broken walls of Jerusalem I came upon a passage that jumped right out at me. I am quoting from Jack Hayford's book "Rebuilding the Real You," for Jeremiah the important fact is that all of the building stones would have come out of the debris of the former walls. Later on he states, there are traits of your own unique personality, memories of your past, qualities of your own character that God wants to repair and retain.
This is amazing to me. It reinforces the God don't create junk. He fashioned me and you with everything we need. He will use even something that looks broken, tattered, in the discard heap to fashion the new, unbroken person. Like Mr. Hayford states....The real you.
So take heart, like I have, you are exactly what God intended you to be. Submitting everything over to Him and the process will bring order into our lives.
Lord, thank you for speaking to me about using what's already mine to make over this broken child of yours. I praise you for all you are going to do. Amen
So taking more steps along the path I am very excited to experience this time alone with the Trinity. My feet may get tired and my body may get weary but my spirit is jazzed up. I'm sure this well marked path may disappear the higher I go but I'm confident because the ultimate guide is at my side.
Beginning the climb into the 'broken' study and in particular my life needed to begin at the beginning as you read yesterday. But no telling how the Holy Spirit is going to guide me through the rest. While reading more about Jeremiah today and his survey of the broken walls of Jerusalem I came upon a passage that jumped right out at me. I am quoting from Jack Hayford's book "Rebuilding the Real You," for Jeremiah the important fact is that all of the building stones would have come out of the debris of the former walls. Later on he states, there are traits of your own unique personality, memories of your past, qualities of your own character that God wants to repair and retain.
This is amazing to me. It reinforces the God don't create junk. He fashioned me and you with everything we need. He will use even something that looks broken, tattered, in the discard heap to fashion the new, unbroken person. Like Mr. Hayford states....The real you.
So take heart, like I have, you are exactly what God intended you to be. Submitting everything over to Him and the process will bring order into our lives.
Lord, thank you for speaking to me about using what's already mine to make over this broken child of yours. I praise you for all you are going to do. Amen
So taking more steps along the path I am very excited to experience this time alone with the Trinity. My feet may get tired and my body may get weary but my spirit is jazzed up. I'm sure this well marked path may disappear the higher I go but I'm confident because the ultimate guide is at my side.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Day 7, You ARE Wanted
It is key to know that the events of this story were told to me by my Aunt. I have chose to forgive both of my parents for feelings, actions, words spoken and attitude. Having grown up, learned about the disfunction and lack of nurture in their upbringing, I knew this played a part in their behavior. I am not excusing them but simply leaving them in the hands of God. I pray for them to know Him as I do and hope that happens before they meet eternity.
As my Aunt stood peering into the nursery window, my father at her side, they were both about to get the first glimpse of me. As the nurse move toward the window with a tightly bundled infant they both leaned forward toward the glass. She repositioned me in her arms and then mouthed to the window, "It's a girl."
"Oh Sh--!, and where did she get that red hair." It was his initial welcome statement as he turned and walked away. My Aunt in disbelief mouthed a "thank-you" to the nurse watching as she placed me in the bassinet. As she turned to leave, my father was nowhere in site.
My parents hadn't planned me. My mother had thought my father was not able to have children due to a sick and twisted joke he played on her just days before they got married. My mother, not needing birth control (or so she thought), continued her studies at college to become a P.E. major. My father worked two jobs and built houses with his brother. The last thing they wanted to hear was that they were expecting. My father had to take on another part time job and my mother changed her major from P.E. to elementary education. They both were not happy with this family expansion and what it had done to both of their dreams for the future.
I wish I could say that after the initial shock was over they both embraced me in love and my childhood was wonderful. Hardly. It was tough. I've never known a loving embrace or approval from either of them. As the years went on and my two younger brothers were born it was even more lopsided. It was very much a family of male acceptance. I was alone in a family of five. I tried for the better part of fifty years to gain some approval, a "I'm proud of you", something. What resonates is all the things I did wrong, should have done, and could have if I'd been a boy.
But God made me. He knew what I would face. He knew the family I was being born into. It took me years to realize that for purposes, some known and others yet unknown, God has a plan to use all of this.
So where are you, my reader? If you had a wonderful beginning and nurturing family I am happy for you. If on the other hand you can relate to a portion of my story I want to offer you my love and hope. Bigger than all the trauma of a spoiled childhood is the ability to reach those that have been hurt. Words, I wish, could cure all wounds but they don't. But the Holy Spirit does. He brings the supreme love of God and not only imparts that but begins to overlay the bad with a warmth that takes the sting out of remembering. I will never forget things in my childhood and neither will you but God is capable of removing the intense feelings that are associated with events.
As I wiped my eyes and stood up from the grass I had a determination in my step. I knew that God was there in the moment of my conception and my birth. Fatherly approval I have always had in a pure form, I was just looking horizontally instead of vertically. I could hear the Lord telling my heart that His love was unconditional. "Stop trying to earn it, just relax into his arms." This journey will get steep at times but everything I am going to need is these arms that are supporting me just like they have my entire life.
Lord, I thank you for being my protector, my strength, and loving Father. Continue your perfect plan for me. Help me to bring healing to others who have felt abandoned, abused, alone. Amen
I took off stepping out of the grassy place and into a sandy soil. There were patches of green here and there but they grew fewer as I approached the rise and a well marked path. I hadn't seen this path from afar off. Guess I needed that first touch from the Lord to direct me to this spot. I glance up at a majestic mountain in front of me. I feel a slight skip beat of my heart. I reach down and pick up a tiny rock. It's really plain and weather beaten with some blemishes in the cracks but turning it over is a smooth, pretty almost shiny side. Kinda feels like me.
As my Aunt stood peering into the nursery window, my father at her side, they were both about to get the first glimpse of me. As the nurse move toward the window with a tightly bundled infant they both leaned forward toward the glass. She repositioned me in her arms and then mouthed to the window, "It's a girl."
"Oh Sh--!, and where did she get that red hair." It was his initial welcome statement as he turned and walked away. My Aunt in disbelief mouthed a "thank-you" to the nurse watching as she placed me in the bassinet. As she turned to leave, my father was nowhere in site.
My parents hadn't planned me. My mother had thought my father was not able to have children due to a sick and twisted joke he played on her just days before they got married. My mother, not needing birth control (or so she thought), continued her studies at college to become a P.E. major. My father worked two jobs and built houses with his brother. The last thing they wanted to hear was that they were expecting. My father had to take on another part time job and my mother changed her major from P.E. to elementary education. They both were not happy with this family expansion and what it had done to both of their dreams for the future.
I wish I could say that after the initial shock was over they both embraced me in love and my childhood was wonderful. Hardly. It was tough. I've never known a loving embrace or approval from either of them. As the years went on and my two younger brothers were born it was even more lopsided. It was very much a family of male acceptance. I was alone in a family of five. I tried for the better part of fifty years to gain some approval, a "I'm proud of you", something. What resonates is all the things I did wrong, should have done, and could have if I'd been a boy.
But God made me. He knew what I would face. He knew the family I was being born into. It took me years to realize that for purposes, some known and others yet unknown, God has a plan to use all of this.
So where are you, my reader? If you had a wonderful beginning and nurturing family I am happy for you. If on the other hand you can relate to a portion of my story I want to offer you my love and hope. Bigger than all the trauma of a spoiled childhood is the ability to reach those that have been hurt. Words, I wish, could cure all wounds but they don't. But the Holy Spirit does. He brings the supreme love of God and not only imparts that but begins to overlay the bad with a warmth that takes the sting out of remembering. I will never forget things in my childhood and neither will you but God is capable of removing the intense feelings that are associated with events.
As I wiped my eyes and stood up from the grass I had a determination in my step. I knew that God was there in the moment of my conception and my birth. Fatherly approval I have always had in a pure form, I was just looking horizontally instead of vertically. I could hear the Lord telling my heart that His love was unconditional. "Stop trying to earn it, just relax into his arms." This journey will get steep at times but everything I am going to need is these arms that are supporting me just like they have my entire life.
Lord, I thank you for being my protector, my strength, and loving Father. Continue your perfect plan for me. Help me to bring healing to others who have felt abandoned, abused, alone. Amen
I took off stepping out of the grassy place and into a sandy soil. There were patches of green here and there but they grew fewer as I approached the rise and a well marked path. I hadn't seen this path from afar off. Guess I needed that first touch from the Lord to direct me to this spot. I glance up at a majestic mountain in front of me. I feel a slight skip beat of my heart. I reach down and pick up a tiny rock. It's really plain and weather beaten with some blemishes in the cracks but turning it over is a smooth, pretty almost shiny side. Kinda feels like me.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Day 6, Shame & Humiliation
My morning prayer time directed me to three different chapters of Isaiah. I will summarize the key portions especially speaking to me for this 'broken' journey.
Chapter 29:17-18 talks about the fertile field becoming a forest as the deaf will hear and the blind will see. Both deaf and blind can be broken conditions from birth. In wondering where the Lord would lead me to start healing broken places in my own life it makes perfect sense that He would want to correct a birth defect. A perception is more like it. The foundation for what is to come will be restoring a correct heart set. Notice I didn't say mind set. I want God to change my heart and then my mind can line up,
Going back in time I prayed about when it all went wrong. I know from scripture that everyone, me included, was knit together by God. That means to me that aside from the intentions of my biological parents once the conceiving process began God began the work of forming me. That means that everything about me is His design and intention.
Isaiah 54:4 tells me to fear not, forget the shame of my youth, to not be humiliated or disgraced. Reading further that God called me and that no weapon formed against me shall prosper and further more every tongue that accuses me in judgement I will condemn.
Isaiah 61:7 says that instead of shame I will have a double portion and instead of humiliation everlasting joy.
I can see where this is headed and so I sit down. There in that green, lush, comfortable grassy field I bow my head and weep. I know why this journey is starting at this point, this revelation. There is a huge correction that has to take place in my heart. The story is a painful one and it cuts me today with an even greater intensity than when I first heard it. I think that is because I have birthed four children. My overwhelming love for them was and continues to be the center of my world. The thought of ever rejecting, shaming or humiliating them is beyond even imagination. I couldn't wait to hold them, kiss them, nurture them. But for me.......it was a very different story. That is why this journey of 'broken' must start here.
Lord, I praise you for your creation that is me. I will forever love you and welcome your embrace. It is the kisses and nurture you have and continue to provide that made me the person I am today. Thank you for holding my heart when it was torn and crushed. Kissing away the bruises and guiding me along the path of life. I am in your hands for this journey and the only voice I want to hear is yours. Amen
Before you hear the story just remember I was fearfully and wonderfully made. Loved and wanted by my heavenly father for such a time as this and for His service. I share my life only to glorify Him.
The only person who was there on December 7, 1954 besides my parents was my dear sweet Aunt. She was like a grandmother to me and it caused her extreme pain to relive the moment she first saw me at the nursery window with my father at her side........
Chapter 29:17-18 talks about the fertile field becoming a forest as the deaf will hear and the blind will see. Both deaf and blind can be broken conditions from birth. In wondering where the Lord would lead me to start healing broken places in my own life it makes perfect sense that He would want to correct a birth defect. A perception is more like it. The foundation for what is to come will be restoring a correct heart set. Notice I didn't say mind set. I want God to change my heart and then my mind can line up,
Going back in time I prayed about when it all went wrong. I know from scripture that everyone, me included, was knit together by God. That means to me that aside from the intentions of my biological parents once the conceiving process began God began the work of forming me. That means that everything about me is His design and intention.
Isaiah 54:4 tells me to fear not, forget the shame of my youth, to not be humiliated or disgraced. Reading further that God called me and that no weapon formed against me shall prosper and further more every tongue that accuses me in judgement I will condemn.
Isaiah 61:7 says that instead of shame I will have a double portion and instead of humiliation everlasting joy.
I can see where this is headed and so I sit down. There in that green, lush, comfortable grassy field I bow my head and weep. I know why this journey is starting at this point, this revelation. There is a huge correction that has to take place in my heart. The story is a painful one and it cuts me today with an even greater intensity than when I first heard it. I think that is because I have birthed four children. My overwhelming love for them was and continues to be the center of my world. The thought of ever rejecting, shaming or humiliating them is beyond even imagination. I couldn't wait to hold them, kiss them, nurture them. But for me.......it was a very different story. That is why this journey of 'broken' must start here.
Lord, I praise you for your creation that is me. I will forever love you and welcome your embrace. It is the kisses and nurture you have and continue to provide that made me the person I am today. Thank you for holding my heart when it was torn and crushed. Kissing away the bruises and guiding me along the path of life. I am in your hands for this journey and the only voice I want to hear is yours. Amen
Before you hear the story just remember I was fearfully and wonderfully made. Loved and wanted by my heavenly father for such a time as this and for His service. I share my life only to glorify Him.
The only person who was there on December 7, 1954 besides my parents was my dear sweet Aunt. She was like a grandmother to me and it caused her extreme pain to relive the moment she first saw me at the nursery window with my father at her side........
Friday, July 13, 2012
Day Five, Taking Off
I survived my long yesterday in two airports and a full day of training. Getting home and to bed late caused me to wake-up a bit late. I had to hurry to the office for a presentation during my company staff meeting. Little time for solitude in prayer, so as I did what we all do much of the time.....prayed en route.
After leaving you yesterday with me in my boots and ready to begin this journey I asked God why the hiking analogy. I have never longed to trek up a hillside let alone a mountain. But I keep seeing this as that type of journey. So I'm going with it and you are all along for the experience, step-by-step where he leads me.
The first thing I saw at my feet was this very green, manicured grass, no flowers. This is a bit confusing to me, only grass because I would love to see a few flowers. (The kind in a vase are especially nice, hint hint if my husband is reading this.) But for as far as I can see on all sides there is only a very calming field of unblemished sod. In the distance I see a rise of what resembles a range of elevation. The range disappears into the low hanging clouds. Probably a good thing. If I could see the top I'm sure I would be hesitant, scared and trepidatious. I can feel my heart beat a bit faster. With every step I take I am leaving behind the comfort of this level ground and its beauty and the ease to my gait. Pushing forward I breathe in and out while praising God for what all lies in store.
I hear the Lord telling me and the Holy Spirit is reassuring that I am in the best hands ever. Going in reverse is not an option. I'm committed to this process and to lean into everything. So I raise my head, look forward not behind and take off in the direction of what I see on the horizon. There is nothing broken here except the sojourner.
Lord, please hold my hand and speak to me daily as I undergo what you have determined is for my good. Please keep me from growing weary, help my heart to be strong and full of belief when I am tempted to give up. Bless my readers who are along on this journey. If anything or everything I experience helps them I give you all the glory. Amen
Here's to the travel, revelation, healing and growth. I have begun and there is no retreat. I can do this!
After leaving you yesterday with me in my boots and ready to begin this journey I asked God why the hiking analogy. I have never longed to trek up a hillside let alone a mountain. But I keep seeing this as that type of journey. So I'm going with it and you are all along for the experience, step-by-step where he leads me.
The first thing I saw at my feet was this very green, manicured grass, no flowers. This is a bit confusing to me, only grass because I would love to see a few flowers. (The kind in a vase are especially nice, hint hint if my husband is reading this.) But for as far as I can see on all sides there is only a very calming field of unblemished sod. In the distance I see a rise of what resembles a range of elevation. The range disappears into the low hanging clouds. Probably a good thing. If I could see the top I'm sure I would be hesitant, scared and trepidatious. I can feel my heart beat a bit faster. With every step I take I am leaving behind the comfort of this level ground and its beauty and the ease to my gait. Pushing forward I breathe in and out while praising God for what all lies in store.
I hear the Lord telling me and the Holy Spirit is reassuring that I am in the best hands ever. Going in reverse is not an option. I'm committed to this process and to lean into everything. So I raise my head, look forward not behind and take off in the direction of what I see on the horizon. There is nothing broken here except the sojourner.
Lord, please hold my hand and speak to me daily as I undergo what you have determined is for my good. Please keep me from growing weary, help my heart to be strong and full of belief when I am tempted to give up. Bless my readers who are along on this journey. If anything or everything I experience helps them I give you all the glory. Amen
Here's to the travel, revelation, healing and growth. I have begun and there is no retreat. I can do this!
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Day Four, The Process
I write this morning while waiting to board a plane for out of state training with my job. While I have a few minutes, let me share today's part of the journey which involves the process.
It is one thing to pick a word, submit the year to study, prayer and action. The best part is getting mentally and spiritually ready for what will be revealed and how the Holy Spirit will move to make necessary corrections.
I woke today a bit tired from only a few hours sleep but energized in my spirit for the new things this year will bring. I know the work will be hard at times. Like climbing a mountain there are periods of level terrain between steeper advances. The goal, keep moving upward and onward. I have my prayer time in place, my refreshing comfort of the Holy Spirit ever with me and you, my readers who will be forever my friends.
So with my feet in my boots, the Word in my heart I'm stepping into the path of this year.
Lord, Guide me where I need to go, reveal to me what I need to know and help me every inch of the way. My eye is fixed on the mountain top where the journey will have it's finish. Let me experience more of you and embrace everything along the way. Amen
Ready, set, go.....I'm off.
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Day Three, Perception
So yesterday while I was driving along and mulling over what I heard in my spirit about perception I heard more.
It is true that to us when something is broken it is useless and not able to perform the function it had originally. We can try, and often times we do, to mend, patch, glue, duct tape, etc. so we can get more use out of the broken thing. But what happens when the thing is instead a person?
Our view of being whole and in tact is simply that, our view. Put the eyes of God on our lives. His perception of people who are broken is very different. He starts with these broken pieces as a launching pad for an even greater purpose than we can imagine. The patching, remodeling, restoration process takes rejected, damaged, discarded pieces and makes something brand new. All those areas that are incomplete, tattered, demolished are useful for the kingdom. He designed you and me and longs to redeem our lives.
So today the prayer and focus is on seeking to know and then confess my areas of struggle, my heartache, imperfections, isolation, defeat. The Bible tells us in Matthew 7:7-8 that he who asks receives and a seeker finds. I know it's hard, who wants to see all their flaws and admit them. After all showing weakness is not good, or is it? I will admit that knowing my weaknesses is the only way to become strong. Besides God will use those weaknesses to propel me and you into our purpose.
With a starting place I am presenting myself in all my shortcomings before the throne. I am coming boldly before Him for the work only He can do, desire for every broken place to be restored and then used to bring healing to others. Much like prepping for surgery, I'm not excited about undergoing the knife but in this case I know who holds the scalpel and I trust Him with every inch of my being.
Lord, show me, expose the areas, events, traumas, disappointments, illusions, behaviors that are keeping me from fulfilling my purpose. Holy Spirit help me to profess out loud what is revealed. Take what is hiding in my flesh and expose it to the light. Obliterate it like a laser. Then heal me and show me how to walk out a new life, committed and whole. Just as I was knit together in the beginning, restore me to a beautiful vessel, return me to a unblemished reflection of you. Amen
I'll be real and transparent with you, my reader, sharing the good, the bad and the ugly. There's transformation coming in areas never imagined or thought possible. Like visiting my doctor and dreading the bad news, I'm scared what may be revealed but admit there is no other way to live without brokenness reversed. I am so happy you are along with me on the journey. Like Dr. Oz, the NY heart surgeon said yesterday, "I never do heart surgery on an individual without a loved one near by, because if you don't have a reason for your heart to beat, it won't."
I hope my blogs will bring along many readers and if you are out there let me hear from you. It is nice to know loved ones, dear friends and soon to be internet pals are close by.
It is true that to us when something is broken it is useless and not able to perform the function it had originally. We can try, and often times we do, to mend, patch, glue, duct tape, etc. so we can get more use out of the broken thing. But what happens when the thing is instead a person?
Our view of being whole and in tact is simply that, our view. Put the eyes of God on our lives. His perception of people who are broken is very different. He starts with these broken pieces as a launching pad for an even greater purpose than we can imagine. The patching, remodeling, restoration process takes rejected, damaged, discarded pieces and makes something brand new. All those areas that are incomplete, tattered, demolished are useful for the kingdom. He designed you and me and longs to redeem our lives.
So today the prayer and focus is on seeking to know and then confess my areas of struggle, my heartache, imperfections, isolation, defeat. The Bible tells us in Matthew 7:7-8 that he who asks receives and a seeker finds. I know it's hard, who wants to see all their flaws and admit them. After all showing weakness is not good, or is it? I will admit that knowing my weaknesses is the only way to become strong. Besides God will use those weaknesses to propel me and you into our purpose.
With a starting place I am presenting myself in all my shortcomings before the throne. I am coming boldly before Him for the work only He can do, desire for every broken place to be restored and then used to bring healing to others. Much like prepping for surgery, I'm not excited about undergoing the knife but in this case I know who holds the scalpel and I trust Him with every inch of my being.
Lord, show me, expose the areas, events, traumas, disappointments, illusions, behaviors that are keeping me from fulfilling my purpose. Holy Spirit help me to profess out loud what is revealed. Take what is hiding in my flesh and expose it to the light. Obliterate it like a laser. Then heal me and show me how to walk out a new life, committed and whole. Just as I was knit together in the beginning, restore me to a beautiful vessel, return me to a unblemished reflection of you. Amen
I'll be real and transparent with you, my reader, sharing the good, the bad and the ugly. There's transformation coming in areas never imagined or thought possible. Like visiting my doctor and dreading the bad news, I'm scared what may be revealed but admit there is no other way to live without brokenness reversed. I am so happy you are along with me on the journey. Like Dr. Oz, the NY heart surgeon said yesterday, "I never do heart surgery on an individual without a loved one near by, because if you don't have a reason for your heart to beat, it won't."
I hope my blogs will bring along many readers and if you are out there let me hear from you. It is nice to know loved ones, dear friends and soon to be internet pals are close by.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Day Two, Definition
WOW. It has been some time since I thumbed through the dictionary. Could I have picked an easier word? Maybe, but that wasn't where I was directed. So here goes...
I found my word, broken, and the definitions were plentiful. Whether you look up broken as an adjective or break as a verb the endless list of descriptive uses are enough to keep this girl busy for 365 days with no problem. I can feel the Lord at work already.
I used my early morning prayer time to ask His help and guidance into not only what He wants me to learn but a systematic, relevant way to tackle this undertaking.
My profession to you my reader, I don't know how this journey will unfold. I am not planning the course. I could use my talent for organization and the strong control portion of my personality to make a list, arrange it just so but then it would be my way. I have submitted this year long word study to the Holy Spirit. We are all about to journey where He leads. Praise God, I'm not in control. I have to admit that relinquishment over to the Spirit is a huge step for me, especially in writing. I'm an outliner and note taker. But submission is part of this process.
Now that the disclaimer has been made, are you ready?
With a deep sigh I opened my bible, began with worship and praise for God. He is all knowing, powerful, protector, and King. He is gentle, loving, a peace maker and majestic. I asked the question, "Why broken? Why am I starting here?" The simple answer I received, "It's a matter of perception. Is it really broken or in transition. In order for something to be broken it had to originate from something whole, in tact, together."
I got it. I needed to start with broken because that is the state most of us find ourselves when we perceive a problem. We usually don't reflect on the status of our lives when things are going good, we are on cloud nine, the world is our oyster. It is when life turns upside down, inside out, destruction and devastation arrive at our doorstep that we break, fall apart, capsize and then cry out for help.
Until tomorrow...
I found my word, broken, and the definitions were plentiful. Whether you look up broken as an adjective or break as a verb the endless list of descriptive uses are enough to keep this girl busy for 365 days with no problem. I can feel the Lord at work already.
I used my early morning prayer time to ask His help and guidance into not only what He wants me to learn but a systematic, relevant way to tackle this undertaking.
My profession to you my reader, I don't know how this journey will unfold. I am not planning the course. I could use my talent for organization and the strong control portion of my personality to make a list, arrange it just so but then it would be my way. I have submitted this year long word study to the Holy Spirit. We are all about to journey where He leads. Praise God, I'm not in control. I have to admit that relinquishment over to the Spirit is a huge step for me, especially in writing. I'm an outliner and note taker. But submission is part of this process.
Now that the disclaimer has been made, are you ready?
With a deep sigh I opened my bible, began with worship and praise for God. He is all knowing, powerful, protector, and King. He is gentle, loving, a peace maker and majestic. I asked the question, "Why broken? Why am I starting here?" The simple answer I received, "It's a matter of perception. Is it really broken or in transition. In order for something to be broken it had to originate from something whole, in tact, together."
I got it. I needed to start with broken because that is the state most of us find ourselves when we perceive a problem. We usually don't reflect on the status of our lives when things are going good, we are on cloud nine, the world is our oyster. It is when life turns upside down, inside out, destruction and devastation arrive at our doorstep that we break, fall apart, capsize and then cry out for help.
Until tomorrow...
Monday, July 9, 2012
Day One, Introduction and WORD selection
After reading Debbie Macomber's book, "One Perfect Word" I decided to begin a one word study. The idea is fantastic! I have no idea where the next 365 days will lead, the insight I will gain, the stories I'll share or the people I may meet along the way. My desire is that others will engage with comments, stories about how this touches them. I would hope that others might find that one word to study for themselves.
Trying to pick that ONE word to spend 365 days studying was no easy task. I prayed and pondered. I looked back at my life and tried to find a common thread. In the selection process I encountered three references to Nehemiah: from a book I was reading, a sermon and from a home group discussion. I felt this was no coincidence so I read through Nehemiah in the Bible. His heart grieved for his people and the destruction they were experiencing in Jerusalem with walls broken, a city in despair.
I had it. My word was right there. BROKEN.
The destruction of the walls of Jerusalem, while a physical representation, are symbolic of what we experience in our own lives, due to adversity, pain, abuse, etc. It was the common thread. The crumbled pieces were meant to be restored, the place where healing, rebuilding begins.
As I seek restoration in my own life and long to minister that to others with the power of the Holy Spirit, it seemed a fitting place to start.
If you are hurting and don't know what to do, or you are struggling with indecision and confusion, or you are at your wits end and ready to give up.....hang on. Join me as we learn about BROKEN and then the blessed peace and joy that come when restoration takes shape.
Let me pray for this journey....
God I ask that you show me over the next year your heart for everyone experiencing brokenness. Do a redeeming work in myself and my readers. Bless each one with all that you have for them. Amen
Let's begin...thanks for coming along.
Trying to pick that ONE word to spend 365 days studying was no easy task. I prayed and pondered. I looked back at my life and tried to find a common thread. In the selection process I encountered three references to Nehemiah: from a book I was reading, a sermon and from a home group discussion. I felt this was no coincidence so I read through Nehemiah in the Bible. His heart grieved for his people and the destruction they were experiencing in Jerusalem with walls broken, a city in despair.
I had it. My word was right there. BROKEN.
The destruction of the walls of Jerusalem, while a physical representation, are symbolic of what we experience in our own lives, due to adversity, pain, abuse, etc. It was the common thread. The crumbled pieces were meant to be restored, the place where healing, rebuilding begins.
As I seek restoration in my own life and long to minister that to others with the power of the Holy Spirit, it seemed a fitting place to start.
If you are hurting and don't know what to do, or you are struggling with indecision and confusion, or you are at your wits end and ready to give up.....hang on. Join me as we learn about BROKEN and then the blessed peace and joy that come when restoration takes shape.
Let me pray for this journey....
God I ask that you show me over the next year your heart for everyone experiencing brokenness. Do a redeeming work in myself and my readers. Bless each one with all that you have for them. Amen
Let's begin...thanks for coming along.
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